At the End of the Day
by Flyvarna
Summary: AU "The pain of losing a loved one never really leaves you, does it?"
1. Chapter 1

At the End of the Day

_(Edited because my absent-mindedness has struk again and I forgot to put the "Disclaimer:I do not own Digimon or any of its' characters" part in.)_

The pain of losing a loved one never really leaves you, does it?

I'd already experienced it just over a year before that day, when my grandmother unexpectedly died of a heart attack. My mother and I were devastated, of course but at least we still had each other. We would get through this.

At least, that's what we thought.

Then one summer day that all changed. I'd gone to the library to get the next book in a series I'd just discovered. Mom was just getting out of work, or so I thought. It was just approaching sunset when I walked the remaining two blocks from the library, backpack full of books, only to notice a police car outside our apartment. I shrugged it off at the time. Our apartment building had multiple families living there. Police cars outside were slightly unusual, but nothing to panic over.

What was different was that the police car's door opened up as I moved around it. A police officer stepped out in front of me.

"Kouichi Kimura?" He asked. I got what could only be called a _bad feeling_ in my stomach. My throat suddenly felt dry, and my voice didn't quite work. I could only nod mutely.

He sighed. "Your mother's been an accident. You need to come with us to the hospital."

That was when I found my voice. "I-is she going to be okay? What happened?"

"She was hit by a car just after she got out of work. I don't know how bad it is, but I was told to bring you to the hospital."

I gasped and moved to the car's other door. Mom was injured, possibly badly...Maybe even dying. A little voice inside of me told me I was a horrible person for going to the library. If I'd been at home instead, we'd be there already. I shuddered and put a mental clamp on that little voice. There was no way either of us would have known this would happen. I wasn't a horrible person.

But that didn't stop me from _feeling_ horrible that whole ride to the hospital.

There was a white-coated doctor waiting for us when we got there. He waved down the police car, then opened the door for me.

"Kouichi, right?" He asked. I nodded. I wanted to ask how my mother was doing, but the doctor gave me no time. "This way," he said, and led me away from the car at a brisk enough pace that I had to nearly jog to keep up. We went like this through the hospital's lobby to the elevator. Once inside I finally got a chance.

"How bad is it? The police officer didn't know."

The doctor cleared his throat awkwardly. "Doctor Kurosawa is the one in charge of the surgery, he's the one to ask."

I blinked, that sinking feeling starting up again in my stomach. _Nobody_ I asked knew how badly my mother was hurt. What if she was dying? What if she was already dead? What would happen to me? I felt my eyes pricking with unshed tears. _ Oh, please don't let her be dead,_ I thought. This had to be some kind of cruel joke. Or maybe it was somehow my fault..._No!_ This wasn't my fault. There was no way either of us had known this was going to happen, I reminded myself. If we had, Mom would've avoided that car and right now I'd be at home curled up with that new book and Mom would be making dinner.

I was led into a waiting room, rather than an emergency room. That wasn't quite what I was expecting. Either they had decided that I was too young for a surgery, and had decided to spare me the sight, or...

...Or my mother was already...

I took a deep breath as the unshed tears threatened again. My hands went through my hair in an effort to stop them from shaking. There wasn't much point in panicking when I didn't even know what was going on. For all I knew, my mother was going to be fine.

I hoped.

I was invited to take a seat. That much at least I could do. I sat down, but didn't have too long to wait before another doctor came in. This one was female, older than my mother. Her graying hair was short, sticking up a bit like the feathers on a bird. She looked really grim. I looked up at her as she came to stand in front of me.

"Kouichi? Your mother...We couldn't save her..."

She said more, but I never did hear what it was. All I could think of was that my mother was _dead,_ she wasn't coming back home to make dinner. She was _gone_, just like Grandma, and I was alone. The tears that I'd been holding back since I'd arrived at the hospital broke through in my overwhelming grief, and I completely broke down.

I don't remember too much of the hours that followed. I remember crying myself out on some person's shoulder. I think it was an orderly or volunteer. I can't remember what they looked like, or even if it was a man or woman. I think whoever it was just let me cry myself out.

It was the sun streaming through the window that woke me up the next morning. I sat there, wondering why I'd left the window shade open when I realized that this wasn't _my _bed at home. That was when the memories of last night, and the crushing grief, hit me like a ton of bricks.

"M-mom..."

I sat up and hugged my knees to my chest as the tears started again. Oh, _Mom!_ I wanted to be with her so much...I wished I could go back in time and stop that car from hitting her. I wanted to go home. I wanted...

What would happen to me now? I wondered, more in an effort to keep myself from being drowned by the wave of grief and loneliness. Most likely I'd end up with my father, if they could track him down. My father...I hadn't thought of him in years. My parents had gotten a divorce when I was two, and try as I might, I couldn't remember Mom saying anything about him afterwards. He'd_ left _us, I thought as the tears of grief became tears of bitter rage. If Dad had stayed with us, Mom wouldn't have had to work so much to support me, and she would've had a different job. She'd be _alive_ now.

This was all my father's fault.

I took a deep breath to steady myself. What was I _saying_? It wasn't Dad's fault any more than it was my own. No, the only person at fault was the one who drove the car. Especially since Mom was a big stickler for crosswalks. I wondered what that person's excuse had been. Speeding...Driving while talking on a cell phone, perhaps. It had been a bit early in the day for alcohol, but I couldn't completely rule that out.

And what if they couldn't find my father, or if he didn't want to take care of me? I shuddered as more tears came down. I wouldn't end up in a foster home. Mom had friends from her job...Maybe some of them could take me in. Or my classmates from school. Or...I had no idea, but it was something to think about besides the grief. Something to think about...I glanced at the floor beside the bed. Sure enough, someone had placed my backpack there. A backpack with several books in it...And books meant something better to keep my mind busy, and the overwhelming grief away.

I was three chapters into the book when the door opened and a female nurse came in with a tray full of food.

"Kouichi? Are you feeling better?"

Now, that was probably the stupidest question she could ask. Of course, I wasn't feeling better, I'd just lost my mother! I gripped the edges of the book to keep my hands from shaking as she unfolded little legs on the "tray" to make a table, and put it down over me.

"I brought you some breakfast. The doctor says you might not have much of an appetite, but she says to at least try some. Your mother wouldn't be too happy with you if you starved to death, right? I'll be back in an hour."

The nurse was out before I could respond...Even if I wanted to. With a sigh I put the book down and mechanically started eating. I couldn't tell you how the food tasted, I was too busy trying to convince myself that I had an appetite. Reminding myself that life went on, even if my mother was...Was gone...

I swallowed down as much of the food as I could, then went back to curling up with that book. As she had said, the nurse was back an hour later to take the tray. She also had some news.

"Kouichi, we've gotten in contact with your father. He's going to take care of the funeral arrangements, and he'll also be taking custody of you." The nurse said that all matter-of-factly. I wondered if she'd just started her career in nursing. She clearly had no idea of what I was going through, and even less of what the situation with my father was like. And worse, she'd brought up something else I hadn't wanted to think about. The funeral. Here in Japan, we cremate our dead. The bones are traditionally picked out of the ashes by relatives. In fact, my mother and I had done just that a year ago for Grandma. And now I would have to do it all again. For my mother. _Alone._

"...Your father will be here in about a half-hour," the nurse was saying, once again completely oblivious to the fact that my hands were clenched, and my shoulders were shaking with the effort to stifle tears. Or maybe she wasn't. Doctors weren't supposed to be emotionally attached to their patients. How could _anyone_ get used to the thought of losing people? Even if it was their job to make sure those people stayed living.

Unemotional or new, it didn't matter. The nurse was just doing her job. I wasn't going to hold it against her. I politely thanked her, then waited until she left to curl up in my bed again as my body shook with suppressed sobs. It wasn't _fair!_ My mother should've been at home, enjoying her rare day off! Not _dead. _Not on some table in an emergency room, or a crematory's slab, or wherever they kept the dead! I closed my eyes and leaned into the pillow, hoping to at least get some sleep. Now there was a thought. If I could fall asleep before my father could get here, I not only wouldn't have to deal with him, but I could forget about my mother...

...For a few hours, at least.

In the end it might have been better if I'd stayed awake. My sleep was filled with nightmares of my mother and grandmother, and being left alone with the cold emotionless faceless stranger that was my father. I awoke to find myself tangled in the blankets, then realized that I had left the world of my nightmares for something even more inescapable: Reality. My mother and grandmother were still gone, and I was still _alone_...A shuddering sob shook my body as that truth sank into me.

Then a hand gently settled on my shoulder. Probably some doctor or nurse. I closed my eyes as I felt the blanket being pulled over me. I must've knocked it off in my nightmares.

A cell phone rang from where the person behind me was. Wait, weren't cell phones not allowed in hospitals? That meant, I realized with a sinking heart, that the person visiting me was none other than _my father_. I stifled a gasp and lay still, pretending to still be asleep. There was a soft curse behind me as my father fiddled around with his cell phone, then the ringing stopped.

"Satomi?" Dad said, obviously talking to the phone. "Yeah, I'm at the hospital. He's asleep right now. How's Kouji taking it?"

I had no idea who Satomi or Kouji were, and at this point I really didn't care. I wanted to just put my hands on my ears to block out the conversation altogether, but that would prove I was awake, and I'd have to deal with my father.

"I know I know," my father sounded like he didn't want to deal with this situation, either. "I can't make any excuses about how I lied to both of you. All I can do is try to make up for what happened." There was another pause, then: "I understand. I'll see you later, all right?" Then there was the "click" of the phone hanging up. I heaved a mental sigh of relief.

"All right Kouichi, I know you're awake," my father said suddenly. I winced, but otherwise didn't move. I did _not _want to have anything to do with my father. Not unless he had a way to bring my mother back from the dead...

"I know you don't want to have anything to do with me right now," Dad continued. "Believe me, I honestly didn't expect the marriage to crumble so quickly after you were born. Your mother..."

"Please," I said, in a voice that sounded raspy to my ears. Probably from all the crying I'd been doing. "Just go away."

"I can't do that. Look Kouichi, whether we like it or not your mother is dead, and..." He paused, I think it was to choose his words. "The only family you have left is on my side. I don't want you to be alone, okay?"

I ignored him.

"There's something else I need to talk about, Kouichi. Did Tomoko...Did your mother ever tell you you have a twin brother?"

What?

There was no way this was possible. Right? It couldn't be true. A brother...Come to think of it, I had once caught Mom looking at a photo album when I was little. When I'd gotten a glance at the book I'd seen pictures of what I'd thought was myself as a baby. Strangely I'd never seen that photo album again. She must have hid it up in the closet or something. And if the boy in the pictures hadn't been me, but a brother I never knew...

And hadn't my father mentioned someone called Kouji when he was on the phone?

I finally rolled over to look at my father. He wasn't the faceless, cold man that had shown up in my nightmares. Instead, he was a perfectly normal looking man. He also looked a bit like me. Mostly just the face, though. I didn't need glasses, for instance.

"B-Brother?" I could barely get the word out. "But...That's...Why didn't she tell me?"

"Probably for the same reason I never told Kouji about you until now," he told me. "With the divorce getting so ugly, it just hurt too much to talk about either of you, so I didn't. When Kouji asked about his mother, all I could say was that she was dead. And then everything came back to bite me in the behind."

I couldn't really say anything to that. The silence that followed suddenly go very awkward, and my father cleared his throat.

"A-anyways, I'm going to see who I can talk to about getting you out of here. You're technically not supposed to be here, since you aren't physically hurt but nobody wanted to send you home after all that." He got up to go but as he did I caught a glimpse of gold on his right hand.

A wedding ring.

It was bad enough that he had abandoned me and Mom, but to leave us for another woman? That was unthinkable! How dare he! I started shaking again, this time with suppressed rage. I couldn't forgive him for doing this to us. To _me!_

I was lost in my rage and grief that I hardly noticed when my father came back in a few minutes later.

"Kouichi? I'm gonna need your help for this...Kouichi?" A hand gently shook my shoulder. I turned my head to glare at him.

"You're married." I said it flatly. My father blinked, like he hadn't been expecting this. That if anything made me even angrier. "Was she worth leaving us for? Was she worth all this pain?"

"Kouichi!" My father actually had the nerve to sound shocked. At some distant level I too was shocked. I'm not normally the kind of person to explode like that, but at that point the rage was just too much. I got to my feet, fists clenched as I continued.

"You left my mother to raise me all by herself! If you hadn't divorced her she wouldn't have had to work so hard. She'd be _alive_ now if you hadn't..."

And I couldn't say anything more. The tears were choking me; that was _nothing _compared to the crushing wall of grief, and I collapsed against him sobbing. Partly because of the grief, partly because of what I had just said. Was I really blaming my father for something he had nothing to do with? My father's arms wrapped around me.

"It's like there's a hole in your heart that can't possibly be filled," Dad remarked. "I can't really say I understand what you're going through, but when...The divorce happened, it was very similar. I lost both you and your mother, and couldn't do a thing about it. I didn't take it very well...I buried myself in my work, took every promotion they'd give me. I even moved around to keep busy. It wasn't until I met Satomi that I realized that moving all the time was even harder on Kouji. Every time he made friends, I got promoted, and we'd have to move again."

I felt the arms around me tighten.

"I'm only human...I make mistakes. So did your mother. If we'd found some way to make the marriage, or even the divorce, work out I'm sure your mother would still be here. I'm sorry it didn't work. I'm sorry we split you boys up. It always seems to be the good people that suffer the most, doesn't it?"

I gulped down another sob and looked up at him.

"D-Dad, I'm sorry too...I didn't mean what I said about you."

He smiled. "It's okay. You're going through a lot right now. Your brother called me worse, when he found out last night. He's going through a lot, too." He turned, taking one arm off my shoulder to pick up the papers he'd evidently dropped when I had started yelling. "Now let's get these papers done so we can get out of here and go introduce you to your brother."

"Y-Yeah," I said wiping my eyes. "And...Dad?"

He looked at me.

"Thank you,"

**Author's note: I'm not normally the type of person to write sad stories like this. It was a...I think the phrase is "Plot Bunny" that decided to pay me a visit and wouldn't leave. **

**Anyways, I'd originally thought of this as a one-shot, if the Plot Bunny stays with me (Let's just say I've got a ton of half-written fics I'm struggling with because the plot didn't really go anywhere.) I might expand this. I probably will, since the brothers have yet to meet.**

**I hope I did this realistically enough. I consider myself fortunate to have never lost anyone I'm close to, but in the last six months I've had a friend and relative both lose loved ones. That sadly was what started the Plot Bunny in the first place. Real-life angst over not being able to do anything for a friend or relative beyond moral support. Yeah, I think most of us have been there at one time or another.**

**Oh, I should mention that the title comes from a Les Miserables song. One of those depressing songs with a hopeful ending. I'd just seen a live performance of Les Mis, and the music was still in my head.**

**That's enough rambling. Reviews are appreciated. Thanks for reading!**

**Edit: Looks like this isn't going to be one chapter after all. I'm working on chapter two right now.**


	2. Chapter 2

_(Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon nor any of its' characters or any other franchise I may accidentally mention. Enjoy!)_

An hour after I had blown up at my father, the release forms were completed, and I'd learned something new, my father's name. Kousei Minamoto. I wasn't really surprised that my father had a different last name from my mother and myself. They had gotten divorced, so it made sense that my mother had gone back to her maiden name. I briefly wondered if I'd have to change my last name to Minamoto, too, but Dad quickly cut off that notion.

"You don't have to change your last name if you don't want to," he said. "I can understand how hard it is to change your name. Satomi was calling herself Satomi Uehara for months after we got married." He paused, looking at me pointedly. I wondered for one moment if I'd done something wrong when Dad spoke up again.

"You might want to wash your face before we leave," he remarked, as I picked up my backpack. "You look like a mess."

"I feel like a mess," I responded. Yeah, I _would_. I had been crying my eyes out for the last day, and hadn't exactly been able or willing to brush out my hair. Stepping into the bathroom and looking into the mirror I saw that, naturally, I_ did _look like a mess. Puffy eyes and all. Well, at this point the only thing I could do was splash some water on my face.

It was early evening by the time we left the hospital, and got into Dad's car.

"Satomi's probably already made dinner by now," my father commented as he drove down the crowded street. "She's expecting us though, so I wouldn't be too surprised if she set some aside for both of us. If not, she'll probably whip something simple up."

"Thank you," I replied. Truth to be told, my appetite hadn't really come back yet, but I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast and I knew I probably should at least try to eat something.

"Tomorrow we'll start clearing out your old home and moving your stuff here," Dad continued. "I'd like you to come with me, if you're up to it. I'm renting a moving truck so that'll get the job done quicker."

I shuddered at the thought of our home getting ransacked. I knew there wasn't any choice, but it still hurt thinking about it.

The Minamoto household was considerably bigger than the one-bedroom apartment my mother and I shared..._Had_ shared, I reminded myself with a wince. Two stories, multiple bedrooms, it even had a fenced-in yard. We barely had a parking lot at our old place. I felt a twinge of envy and resentment at the comparison. My mother worked herself to the bone trying to support the two of us, and we could barely afford a single-bedroom apartment. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that my parents had gotten divorced before I could remember, and from what both of them had said the divorce had been rather ugly. This wasn't anyone's fault.

From inside, I could hear the loud barks of an excited dog. Going by how loud and deep they were, I guessed it to be a rather large dog.

"That's Raiko, Kouji's dog," Dad told me. "She's learned what the car sounds like coming in, and always gets excited. Just ignore her, she's harmless. Satomi's probably bringing her to the backyard, anyways."

Sure enough the barks faded a bit, then came from behind the house. Dad pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. I stepped inside after him, slipping off my shoes and noticing the two other pairs of shoes besides my father's and mine, one pair of which were obviously a woman's shoes, the other were sneakers, about the same size as mine. The woman my father had married...My stepmother's, and...The brother I hadn't met yet. I suddenly felt even more nervous, if at all possible. What was this Kouji like?

"Kousei, you're back?" A woman, in her mid-thirties if I had to guess, came around the corner. Brown hair and glasses framed a face that was evidently used to warm smiles and good feelings. Her eyes flicked to me, and widened.

"You must be Kouichi then," she said. "I'm sorry, times like this...Well, there aren't any words that could describe what you're going through. But if there's anything you need, just ask. You can just call me Satomi, by the way."

"Thank you," I managed to say, as my father walked over to put an arm around her.

"Where's Kouji?" He asked. "Still up in his room?"

"Still there. I heard some music coming from his room, so he's doing something at least. I'd wait a while before I tried talking to him if I were you."

"I know. I wish I had the courage to tell him before," Dad sighed. "He'd have still been angry with me either way."

"Anyways," Satomi said glancing at me. "You two missed dinner, but I kept some in the fridge. I'll go re-heat it."

She turned and headed for what was presumably the kitchen. Dad ran a hand through his hair in a nervous gesture.

"Satomi cleaned out the guest room this morning," he told me. "I'll show you where it is so you can put your backpack up there. We pulled the futon out of the closet so you'll have someplace to sleep besides the couch."

"Okay," I said softly. To be honest, I really didn't care where I slept. I wished my father had taken me to my home instead of his to sleep for the night, but that wasn't much of a choice. Leaving me alone was probably not the best idea, even from my point of view, and it didn't make sense for my father to stay at home with me when he had his own family.

The guest room was upstairs, a mostly bare room with a couple of bookshelves and a dressing table by the bed. I put my backpack by the futon, opened it to pull out that book I'd been reading that morning, but paused as I heard my father step out of the room. I craned my head to see my father knocking on the closed door across from my room.

"Kouji...? We're back. I know you're mad at me. You've got every reason to be, but you should probably come out and meet your brother."

There was silence on the other side of the door.

"We're going downstairs for dinner. Don't forget to let Raiko back in after we're done eating." Dad turned back to me. "It was worth a try."

Satomi's voice floated up the stairs. "Kouichi, what would you like to drink?"

Given how quiet I am, I didn't think she'd hear my response. I grabbed the book and headed downstairs.

"Just tea, thank you." I called as I reached the bottom of the stairs. The couch looked like as good a place to read as anywhere. It was either there, or the bedroom, and since I was already there, I might as well read on the couch. A few seconds later my father also came down the stairs.

"You like books, Kouichi?" He asked. "There's a library about ten minutes walk away from here, Kouji already has a card there...We should get you one when we have a chance."

"I need to return these books soon too," I told him. "I just took them out yesterday, before..." I took a deep breath, trying not to think about what had happened afterwards. I needed to concentrate on_ now_. "If I'm moving, I won't be able to make it back there easily, so I'll read them now while I can."

"You can take all the time you want to read them," Dad said. "Satomi or I can drive you up to your old library to return them when you're ready."

I nodded, then we both looked up as Satomi entered.

"Dinner's ready. Oh, Kouichi would you like any milk in your tea?"

"Yes, thank you." I got up, leaving the book on the couch. Maybe I could find some chance to read it later. While Mom hadn't really cared if I read a book while eating, I suspected Satomi would probably object. And it was rude for a guest to be doing something like that, even if I wasn't exactly the talkative type.

And there was something else there, I realized. Both my father, stepmother, and myself...We were all acting like I was a guest here, not a long-lost son who was in fact about to move in. It wasn't like I was someone who knew these people. I was a stranger. They didn't know me, I didn't know them. Maybe that way of thinking would fade in time, I thought.

Whatever they felt towards me, they at least treated me kindly. I followed my father into the kitchen where Satomi was putting two plates of what looked like teriyaki on the table. I slipped into the chair my father held out for me and began eating.

"So Kouichi," Satomi said sitting down with her own cup of tea. "I've been thinking that we should tell you some more about ourselves, since you're going to be living with us."

"Well, I already told him about Raiko," Dad said. "Let's start with you, honey."

"That sounds like a good enough place to start," Satomi agreed. "We've been married almost three years now...We met six years ago, at a movie theater."

I nodded, feeling guilty for accusing Dad of leaving Mom for her. It couldn't have happened if Dad had met Satomi after the divorce.

"We'd both been brought by friends to a movie we didn't want to see," Dad took up the story. "I thought the movie was so bad, I went out into the lobby..."

"And I was there getting some more popcorn..." Satomi said. "And we started talking. And we were still there talking when the movie ended. We've been close ever since."

"That's really sweet," I said. More to be polite than anything else. It wasn't that I didn't care for Satomi, she honestly seemed like a nice person, but since I'd only known her for a half-hour, she was still a stranger in my eyes. Still, my saying that made her eyes light up, like she wasn't expecting any good reaction. I wondered about that.

With everything that had been happening in the last day, I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised that I didn't finish the whole dish. Satomi was the one who surprised me.

"I didn't think you'd be able to eat that much," she remarked. "When my mother died, it was all I could do to finish a single ramen noodle. It was cancer," she added, as an afterthought. "Two years ago."

"I'm sorry," I murmured. Satomi smiled brightly and put a hand on my shoulder.

"It's okay. I still miss her. You're doing better than I did..."

Whatever else she would've said was interrupted by the sound of a door slamming upstairs. Satomi and my father both jumped and tensed, like they were expecting the worst. I blinked. The sounds upstairs could only be the mysterious Kouji. Was he so bad, I wondered. Then again, if I'd discovered I'd been lied to and the mother I'd been told was dead had in fact been alive until yesterday, I'd be pretty angry too.

Up until that point I hadn't heard much about Kouji. I'd naively assumed that he, being my twin brother, was kind of another version of me. A quiet, bookish kid. The boy who walked into the kitchen however...Well, he had my face and my eyes. His long dark hair was stuck back in a ponytail, a hairstyle my mother had been fond of, since she'd never liked hair getting in her face. It made the resemblance between him and my mother even more pronounced. Except my mother didn't wear a bandana over her hair. And the eyes...His eyes were narrowed, glaring defiantly at anyone who caught his eye. It was an intimidating stare. I swiftly dropped my own gaze to the table.

"So, Kouichi," Satomi said in a slightly louder than normal voice. "I'd like to know what your mother was like, if that's okay. Can you tell us?" She was, no doubt trying to break the ice between me and my brother. I suspected she probably needed something like a pickaxe to do _that._ Still, she genuinely seemed curious.

"She's...Was..." I took a breath trying to keep my voice steady. "She was strong. It wasn't easy, we only had the two of us...She worked so hard to keep us going. Mom...Everything she did, it was for me. She never thought of herself, didn't like it when I made a big fuss for her birthday or when she was sick...She...I..."

"You really miss her," Satomi said as my voice faltered. Her hand came to rest on my shoulder again. I clenched my fists to keep the grief from overtaking me again. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the blue and yellow blur that was Kouji moving again, opening a nearby door that evidently led outside. A moment later a rather large dog bounded into the room. I guessed it to be Raiko. If my limited knowledge of dogs served me, Raiko was a...Something Shepard. German Shepard, that was it. Raiko barked excitedly, no doubt sensing that there was something _exciting_ going on and swiftly pinpointed me as the source of the excitement. She bounded over to me, barking happily.

I'm not a dog person. Especially when the dog is _large. _ I wasn't really scared though.

"H-Hello," I said, holding out my hand for Raiko to sniff. It only lasted for a moment before Raiko barked again and headed for the food dish.

"Kouji, come meet your brother," Dad said suddenly. I gasped and looked down at the table again. At this point, the last thing I wanted was to talk to that intimidating presence that was Kouji. I heard footsteps approaching, but couldn't bring myself to meet those glaring eyes. I couldn't even bring myself to say anything, not even a "nice to meet you." And that was probably the worst of it. Here I was meeting the brother I hadn't known I had and I just froze. The footsteps paused a couple of feet away.

"You can relax," the unfamiliar voice said. He didn't sound angry or anything, just...There didn't seem to be much emotion either way behind those words. Good or bad. "I don't hurt anyone who can't defend themselves." The footsteps then turned and headed away.

"Kouji!" Dad exclaimed. "Is that all you have to say?"

"What?" Kouji retorted, the voice sounding considerably more heated. "What am I supposed to say to a brother I was never told about? Maybe if you hadn't told me my mother was_ dead_, I'd have had more to say. Instead, you make me call a woman that's not even related to me 'mother.'" His voice dripped with sarcasm. "Good idea, Dad."

I decided to look elsewhere. Somewhere, anywhere, just not at the tense scene that was playing out in front of me. Then I saw Satomi sitting across from me, her hands shaking as the cupped them on the table. The expression on her face was heartbreaking. Whatever my brother felt towards her, she definitely cared for him.

"Look, Kouji I told you I was sorry about not telling you two earlier," my father snapped as I reached out across the table and put a hand on Satomi's. She looked up, her eyes widening as she caught my gaze. Then she smiled, and jerked her head in the direction of the living room.

"Let's just let these two wear themselves out butting heads," she said softly enough that I could hear it, even if Dad and Kouji couldn't. I nodded, then grabbed my nearly-empty dish as we both got up. Raiko, possibly as unsettled by the yelling as we were, moved ahead of us pulling a dog toy of some kind out of a nearby box.

"Just leave that dish in the sink," Satomi told me. "I can get it later."

The living room was much quieter, although the muffled shouts of the others could still be heard. I couldn't help thinking that this was my fault. If I'd stayed at the hospital or even just gone back to my old home...No, it wouldn't have worked. They wouldn't have let me. I just came in at a bad time. That was it.

"I'm sorry about Kouji," Satomi paused long enough to take her glasses off and start cleaning them. "Normally he's more respectful towards us than this. He just avoids me most of the time...I think Kouji's got some crazy idea in his head that your father's trying to replace your mother with me, and it started when your father started trying to get him to call me 'mom.' It was all your father's idea. You're lucky you weren't here this morning, when everything broke loose...Let's just say_ I _did some yelling at Kousei, too."

She paused thoughtfully. "I'm sorry. Here I am babbling about Kouji...You must be exhausted."

"I should probably take a bath before I get to bed," I said. Satomi had a point though. Now that the tension over meeting my brother had evaporated, I was starting to feel drained.

"You're right. Come on, let's get you a towel and pajamas. While we're at it, I'll show you where the bathroom is." Satomi led me back up the stairs, pausing to take a towel out of the linen closet next to my new room. Then she pointed out the bathroom at the end of the hall.

"I'll get a pair of Kouji's pajamas," she said. "They ought to fit you. You look like you're the same size as him. Especially since you're twins. Oh, I also went out earlier today and picked up a comb and toothbrush for you."

"Thank you," I said. It didn't take Satomi too long to come back with a pair of light blue two-piece pajamas, comb, and toothbrush. Then I got the water started. It took a lot quicker for the water to get hot than it did at home, I noticed.

Once in the bath, I tried to sort out my confused thoughts. Kouji hadn't been outright rude to me, just abrasive enough to be considered rude by someone with a shorter temper and more awake than me. Satomi was a nice person, who probably deserved some happiness. Dad? Well, he lied to both of the others, so I suspected that he was getting what he deserved. Still, he didn't seem like a bad guy. And to think that when I'd gotten here I'd actually envied my brother! At least Mom and I were close. Even if that made her death all the worse for me.

I was yawning by the time I got out of the bath. I made my way back down the hall to my room, noticing that the door to Kouji's room was closed. Either he was in the habit of closing the door to his room while he was out, or he had finished arguing with Dad. Well, that didn't affect me. I went back into my room, turned off the light, and felt my way back to the futon. I just wanted to sleep and forget the last two days had happened. That wasn't very easy to do in a strange futon and a strange house. I should have dropped off the moment my head hit the pillow, but now there was nothing between me and the raw edges of grief but a lot of darkness. I wanted my mother so badly. I missed her. I felt tears rolling down my cheeks. At this rate, I thought, I was going to make myself sick from crying too much. I had to stop.

But I missed her...

_No!_ I couldn't let the grief overtake me again. I was going to get through this.

But, _Mom_...

I was losing the battle. I grabbed the pillow and shoved it into my face, hoping nobody heard my sobs. It was bad enough that this whole ordeal had turned my father and brother against each other, but I didn't want anyone to hear and cause a big racket. I didn't want to make things worse for everyone...

Between the exhaustion from earlier and the sobs, I was too tired to hear the door open. It wasn't until I felt the pillow being pulled out of nearly limp hands that I realized that someone else _had_ heard. With an effort I opened my eyes just enough to see my mother's face looking down at me.

"M-Mom," I whispered, and gave in to sleep.

**Author's note: I hope I got Kouji's personality down. He seems to be one of the harder Frontier characters to write. Anyways, Raiko...I don't know if it's a real Japanese name for a human or dog, but it should mean "Lightning Girl." Reviews are appreciated. Thank you!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon or any other franschise I may accidentally mention._

The next morning I awoke feeling a peculiar kind of lethargy. Why should I get up? All I'd get was reality. Mom was _dead_, I was living in a household of strangers. What was the point? I sighed as my mind answered the rhetorical question. The point was that Mom wouldn't want me to live her life in sadness. Besides, if she were alive, she'd kill me for thinking thoughts like that. Therefore...

I pulled myself to my feet and headed for the bathroom. As I did, my memories of the last few moments of last night came back to me. That couldn't have been a dream last night. It was probably Kouji I had seen, rather than my mother. Or it _had_ been a dream, and the person who had taken the pillow off my face had in fact been Satomi.

Although it made more sense for the person to be Kouji. Maybe he wasn't such a cold guy after all. I remembered the feeling of air on my face as the pillow had been lifted. Was that something that happened in dreams? I wondered. Probably not.

Coming down the stairs, I saw both Dad and Satomi sitting at the table, eating breakfast. It was unusually peaceful, considering what had happened yesterday. My stomach growled, proving that even if I didn't have much of an appetite, I was still hungry. The noise caught Satomi's attention.

"Oh, Kouichi...Good morning. You're so quiet, I didn't notice you. Here, would you like something to eat?"

I nodded, and moved to sit at the table while Satomi busied herself scooping eggs from the pan on the stove.

"Kouji's out walking Raiko," Dad told me. "He'll be back soon. He's coming with us to help move your stuff. I guess he wanted to see what your mom's place was like."

That made sense. Even if it meant I'd be spending more time with him.

"I've also got a co-worker of mine coming over to help with the heavy stuff," Dad continued. "You boys can pack stuff into boxes, and we'll probably get this done in a few hours. I'm going to sell the furniture off and use the money from that to buy you a new bed. Can't have one son in a bed and the other in a futon."

Satomi put a plate of cooked eggs and a cup of orange juice in front of me and I mechanically began to eat.

"There's something else I wanted to talk to you about," Dad said as Satomi sat down again. "Your mom's...Funeral..." He trailed off awkwardly before resuming. "Normally it's the relatives of the person who died who pick out the bones from the ashes, but you've been through a lot, and I wanted make sure you were up to it..."

"Are you going to leave me out of it again?" Kouji's quiet voice barely hid the sarcasm behind it. I looked up to see him standing in the living room entrance with Raiko's leash curled up in one hand. Raiko herself slipped around Kouji, and headed right for the dish of dog food by the sink.

"You've kept me away from my mother for so long, why stop now?" Kouji glared at Dad, the chill behind it so intense that I quickly turned back to the eggs. They were, in spite of my lack of appetite, delicious. Mom had never been much of a cook. Breakfast had mostly been just rice, since she couldn't make anything more complicated without burning it.

"Kouji, I was going to ask you to do it too," Dad told him. "Every time I tried, it always turned into an argument and I forgot to mention it, okay?"

"Sure. Just like you _forgot _to mention I have a brother..."

"Let's not start this again, okay Kouji? Do you want to pick the bones out of the ashes?"

"That's the only thing I can do for her now, isn't it?"

"Right," My father wearily scrubbed a hand over his face. "What about you, Kouichi?"

I blinked. Did I want to? She was my mother, after all and it was a tradition. But in my eyes it was like saying goodbye.

"You don't have to answer right away," Dad told me. "I scheduled the funeral for tomorrow night, you can think about it until then."

Kouji gave him another glare, then stalked off upstairs, presumably to his room.

After I finished breakfast, Satomi handed me a clean white shirt and jeans. "These are Kouji's," she said. "Your clothes still aren't dry and Kouji won't mind if you wear his clothes for a day."

"Thank you," I murmured, and slipped off to my room to get dressed. Naturally, Kouji's clothes fit me very well. Then I went back to the living room and that book for a while until Dad told me it was time for the move. I went outside to see the moving truck Dad had rented parked in the driveway.

"Pretty big, huh Kouichi?" Dad asked. "We'll probably only have to make one or two trips to the storage unit. I'd imagine you two didn't have too many big things."

I nodded as the house door opened and Kouji came out. He glared at Dad and headed for the truck. Dad sighed.

"It's probably gonna take a long time for him to start speaking to me normally again," he said. I looked down at the ground, feeling like I wanted to disappear into that big crack in the pavement. It wasn't my fault, I knew that for sure. That didn't stop me from feeling a bit guilty over all this.

The ride to the home my mother and I had shared was just as bad. I couldn't think of anything to say, Kouji would probably rather have that ponytail pulled out one hair at a time than talk to Dad...At least without getting into another major argument. Dad just put the radio on and we listened to pop music the whole way there.

Once we got there, I noticed a strange man standing outside our apartment. He was a bit chunkier than normal, with dark hair starting to thin out in the front.

"Kousei, you made it!" He called as we pulled up. "I was beginning to think that son of yours ambushed you."

"Not quite," Dad said as I opened the door and got out of the car. "Kouichi, this is Akira, he works in the same firm as me. Akira, this is the other son I was telling you about."

Akira stared at me, causing me to cast my eyes down on the ground again.

"It's nice to meet you," I mumbled awkwardly.

"Wow, you weren't kidding when you said you had twins. Kouji could probably use him as a mirror."

It felt a little uncomfortable being stared at and talked about like that. I tried to smile politely, but at best could manage a wavering grin. That was when Kouji came between him and me and spoke up.

"Why don't you leave him alone?"

"Kouji!" Dad exclaimed.

"No, it's okay," Akira said. "I was probably making him nervous. Anyways, it was number four, right?"

I nodded, mutely pulling the keys out of my pocket. Kouji had defended me. He didn't have to...That Akira hadn't meant to make me uncomfortable. Why had he done that? I wondered about that. Every time I turned my brother continued surprising me.

The key fit into the lock with a certain amount of wiggling and I opened the door to my home for the last time. Had it only been two days ago that my life had completely shattered?

"Well, this is it," Dad said. "We'll start moving the heavy stuff. You boys get the boxes out of the truck and start packing Kouichi's stuff."

I turned to see Kouji was already at the truck, staggering slightly under the weight of a large pile of cardboard boxes. I swiftly moved to help him, grabbing the other end before they could tip. He glared at me for a moment, then his expression softened a little and changed to gratitude.

The place hadn't changed in the two days since I'd last been there, barring Dad and Akira arguing over how to lift the couch. Any moment now I expected Mom to come out of the bedroom and chew all of us out for not taking off our shoes. But she wasn't coming back, I thought as a new wave of grief tried to swamp me. She was _gone. Dead._

Kouji, no doubt noticing that I'd stopped moving, gently nudged the boxes we were carrying into my stomach to get my attention. I shuddered away from thoughts of my mother and continued carrying them towards the bedroom.

Mom and I had divided our one bedroom into halves. Naturally, my half was full of all the books I'd picked up, mostly used. I moved over to the first of the two bookshelves and pulled out a box to put the books in. Kouji started looking around.

"What did she do for a living?" This was said looking at Mom's clean uniforms hanging in the closet.

"She worked at a doctor's office as a secretary," I said quietly. I really didn't want to focus on Mom too much in case the grief came back and I lost it again.

He didn't reply, but pulled open another box and joined me in putting books in it. After that came the rest of my things. Eventually Dad stuck his head through the door.

"Akira and I got most of the heavy stuff in the living room. We just need to take a quick trip to the storage place so we have room for the rest of your stuff."

"Okay," I said.

It didn't take too long to get the rest of my stuff in a box.

"Guess we're doing Mom's stuff next," Kouji said.

After another hour or so, all that was left outside of the closet was the picture of Grandma to go on top of my clothes, and Mom's jewelry box.

"I wonder if Satomi'd like Mom's jewelery," I said. "Some of those would look pretty good on her."

"No."

"Huh?" I blinked. "She doesn't wear jewelry?"

Kouji's voice was flat, with an edge to it. "You're trying to give _Mom's_ jewelry to someone who isn't related to us."

"What d'you want to do, sell them? It's either that or wear them ourselves. I don't think wearing a woman's necklace is going to work very well, Kouji. I know we could keep them for any girls we marry or for any daughters we might have, but I just don't think Mom would've wanted them to just sit in a box for the next fifteen years!"

Kouji glared at me, then at the box he was holding. "She's not our _mom_!" He snapped.

"So what?" I demanded, a surge of anger rippling through me. What did_ he _know about Mom or our life together? He had two parents, two _still living_ parents, a family that provided more than Mom ever could, and a pet dog. What did we get? "I think _I'd _know what _my _Mom would want to do with her jewelry."

"She's _my_ Mom, too. Or have you already forgotten we're_ twin brothers_?"

It was rather shaming to realize that in fact I _had_. What did _I_ know about _him_? The anger quickly drained out of me as I reached over to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" Kouji jerked away. I blinked. What had I done _now_?

"...I don't like being touched by strangers."

There was a tense silence, as I remembered that brother or not, we were strangers who'd only met less than twenty-four hours ago. What was I thinking? I was such an _idiot. _That's when Dad poked his nose in the room again.

"Boys? You finished in here?"

Kouji turned his head to glare at the offending box again. "Almost. There's only the closet left."

I had to say something. Mom wouldn't like it if we fought all the time. Besides, I realized Kouji was right, she'd want _both_ her sons to have her stuff, not just the one she'd lived with.

"Kouji, I...You were right. I probably spoke too soon about the jewelry. She...She was_ your _mother, too and you should probably get some say in where her stuff goes. I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted," he said still glaring at the box. Then he looked up again, smirking at me. "...Big brother."

Those two words made me blink. Oh yeah, the way our names were written. My "-Ichi" versus his "-Ji." That would mean I was the older one, right? Not that I felt any older, unless you counted everything I'd gone through in the last couple of days.

"Anyways," I said glancing around the room. "That pretty much leaves the closet. We'd better start on that."

"Yeah," Kouji agreed. The closet held mostly dresses and Mom's work uniforms. We couldn't reach the high shelf though.

"I can get that high shelf for you," Akira said, noticing our dilemma through the open door. He hauled down Mom's laundry basket and soap, summer hat, and spare set of formal shoes, then pulled a box from the back.

"There you go," he said and left to help Dad with the kitchen.

"What's this?" Kouji asked, but I had a feeling I already knew. Up in the back of the closet, where I couldn't hope to get it even if I stood on a chair...Mom herself was short enough that she would've needed a chair to reach the back like that. I opened the box.

"I thought so," I said softly.

There on top was that old picture book I'd caught a glimpse of so long ago. Under it was a fairly large stack of unsorted pictures, old letters, and the kinds of toys that a little kid would like.

"This is..." Kouji could get no further.

"This is what Mom kept of you," I told him. "She really loved you, you know. She just didn't have the heart to tell me, I think."

He picked up one of the loose pictures. As he did, his face got this really funny expression, kind of like he'd sucked on a lemon. It was so funny, I burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Kouji demanded irritably.

"Yo-Your face" I gasped. "You look just like M-Mom the...The time she made cake with salt instead of..."

By that point I was laughing so hard nothing could come out. It was probably a bit of hysteria. I wouldn't have been surprised, considering.

"S-Sorry," I stammered as I got ahold of myself. "I shouldn't be laughing...I'm sorry."

Kouji's lips quirked up a bit at the sides. "You haven't seen the picture yet," he remarked holding it up so I could see it. Two babies, I guessed them to be_ us, _in high chairs with some kind of pasta in front of them. Their faces were both covered in pasta sauce. It only served to set me off again. This time however Kouji actually smiled and chuckled a little. Dad, evidently hearing the noise, poked his head in again.

"Kouichi? Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I said, wiping a couple of tears from my eyes. At least it was only a couple this time...And they were from laughter, rather than sorrow.

"We're just about done," Dad told us. "Akira can drive you boys home so you can get something to eat while I finish up here, then I'll bring your mother's stuff to storage and Kouichi's stuff home."

I pulled myself up to my feet. "Okay."

"I'll get the box," Kouji said putting the picture back.

"You can keep it," I told him. "It should be...It's yours, anyways. I don't really need it, I've got the real you, not some pictures."

He looked at me, then down at the box. There was an awkward silence, before Kouji broke it again.

"Let's go. We've still got to _un_-pack your room, and I've got Aikido class later this afternoon."

"Aikido? That's like fighting, right?"

"Sort of. I started taking up self-defense courses when I was six, and every time we moved I'd try something different," Kouji started out the door. "It was Dad's idea. I'm at least competent in four different styles of fighting. Still working on Aikido though. I take classes three times a week."

I didn't bother hiding my surprise, since Kouji had his back to me. That would explain what Akira had said about Kouji _ambushing_ our father.

I couldn't help shuddering as I saw how _empty_ our apartment looked. There was nothing of my mother or me there. _Perhaps that was for the best_, I reflected, as I left for the last time. There was nothing there to hold me back.

_Un_packing my room took up the rest of the afternoon, naturally. Kouji helped at first, then after he had been gone to that Aikido class for an hour or so Satomi arrived.

"It's nearly dinnertime, Kouichi," she said. "Kouji will be back soon, too. You should eat something."

"Thanks," I replied. "I'll be down in a minute."

It was unusual for me to have dinner with anyone besides my mother. It was also unusual to have dinner before sunset, due to Mom working late. By the time she usually got back, she was often tired out from a long day at work so there wasn't much conversation. Luckily Dad and Satomi were making enough conversation that I didn't feel the need to contribute. I ate my dinner in silence. Kouji also ate silently, but that might have been as much a lack of desire to speak to either adult as anything else.

"It was a bit of a hard time finding a used furniture store to buy Tomoko's furniture," Dad was saying. "Most furniture places_ sell _furniture, they don't buy it. But I found a nice place that not only buys and sells stuff, they deliver, too. Kouichi's bed will be here tomorrow afternoon."

"That's wonderful," Satomi said. "Have you ever slept on a bed before, Kouichi? Or just a futon?"

I gulped down a mouthful of food before replying. "Once or twice. Grandma had a bed, but when she died we sold it."

"I'd heard your grandmother died," Dad said gently. "What happened?"

"It was a heart attack, just over a year ago." I closed my eyes, trying not to think of how the deaths of both my grandmother and mother were affecting me. "I was at school, so I didn't see anything."

"She never liked me, but it's still sad to hear she's gone," Dad remarked. "She thought we both should've let you two visit each other, at least." He sheepishly glanced over at Kouji, who was pointedly ignoring him. "If I'd known things would turn out _this _way, I'd have taken her advice, but at the time I wanted nothing to do with her or your mother."

"You should have," Satomi told him. "Even if you didn't love her anymore, Kouichi and Kouji are brothers. They're the ones that got the worst of the divorce."

"That's the way it always goes," Dad sighed. "It's easy to say in hindsight that we should've done something, but at the time...Well, let's just say feelings were running a little high."

Speaking of high feelings, I couldn't help thinking about the argument Kouji and I'd had earlier. Kouji and I were twins, weren't we? Twins were supposed to do things together, and it made no sense for me to leave him to pull M-m-...I pulled myself together. Mom's bones out of the ashes by himself. She was his mother, but she was mine, too.

"D-Dad?" I asked, feeling my voice tremble a little. All three of the others looked at me like they hadn't been expecting me to say anything. Well, they would normally be right, but...

"I decided...I want to pick...At the funeral, I mean. I...I want to help Kouji..." I couldn't get any further. My voice just wouldn't say it out loud. Luckily I'd gotten far enough that my father understood.

"You want to help your brother pick your mother's bones from the ashes?" He asked. I nodded. "I think Tomoko would be proud to hear you say that, Kouichi."

I blushed and looked down at the remains of my meal.

Afterwards, I curled up on the couch to start the second book I got from the library. That was how I spent the final hours before bedtime. As I was in the process of heading to the bathroom for a quick shower, Satomi approached me.

"Kouichi, I meant to talk to you last night about this, but you were asleep when I checked in." I stifled a flinch. Had she heard me crying last night? So much for not making anyone worried.

"Are you going to be okay sleeping by yourself tonight?" Satomi asked. "I have a night light in the kitchen if you need it. Or I could ask Kouji if you can sleep in his room..."

That was the_ last _thing I wanted. It was bad enough that I was unintentionally causing all this trouble, but I didn't want to burden my brother with my presence.

"I'll be okay," I said, trying to show a bit of enthusiasm. "I could use the night light though. Thank you."

Satomi blinked, like she was expecting something else, but smiled.

"I'll go get it. Just a minute." And she was moving down the stairs. I sighed and stepped into my room, which wasn't quite finished. There were one or two boxes left, stuff that had belonged to Mom that I hadn't been able to bear throwing away but couldn't unpack yet. I opened one and pulled out the picture on top. My mother and I, about the age of eight, smiled at me from the park. I smiled faintly remembering that time. We were so close, but that only made Mom's death hurt more. Footsteps from the hall announced the return of Satomi, with a small night light in her hand.

"If you need anything else just ask," she told me. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night," I said politely, closing the door behind her.

And once again I was_ alone_. I took a deep breath. I wasn't going to let myself become a burden. Nor was I going to cry myself to sleep again. I put the night light in the plug, turned off the lights, and lay down on the futon. It wasn't like last night, where the room had been completely bare. All my stuff was there, there was nothing for me to cry over.

Nothing except the fact that I'd never see my mother again...

The thought of her brought up an image of her on the hospital table, pale and still and bleeding...Only to be replaced by ashes when she was cremated. I hadn't actually seen when Grandma was cremated, just the end result, but that didn't stop my entirely too active imagination for supplying the image.

_No,_ I wasn't going to burden anyone. I was fine...

The unwanted tears dripped down my cheeks.

**Author's note: I know very little about Japanese funeral ceremonies, most of what I do know I got from fanfiction...And I didn't have the heart to do real research about it, so yeah there's probably some mistakes there.**


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: I own neither Digimon nor Star Wars, which is mentioned here. Enjoy!_

I woke up once again feeling like I didn't want to get up. This time the lethargy felt a bit different from the last two days. Maybe it was because of the funeral last night. The funeral had pretty much gone like Grandma's, with Mom's friends and co-workers coming to say goodbye, and to tell me how sorry they were...And that Tomoko had never told them she had another son. Other than that, the only differences between Mom's funeral and Grandma's were that Grandma didn't have a rather morbid co-worker who had asked if I'd seen the body. Luckily Kouji had told him to take his curiosity elsewhere, in his naturally very blunt way.

And then there was Kouji. Once that co-worker had left, Kouji hadn't left my side, glaring furiously at anyone who dared come close to me. While there were times I appreciated having a somewhat overprotective brother, the fact was that there were times when the glaring didn't help matters. Especially when the teenage girl who had driven that car had arrived. She was just as devastated as I was, even worse in a way. She had only just gotten her driver's license two days before. She had told me, through sobs, that she'd never take the wheel of a car again.

The funeral had taken everything out of me, and when we got home, I was so exhausted I hadn't even been able to cry anymore. Maybe that was why I felt so tired today. I thought about it for a minute. Actually, it didn't quite feel like I was tired. More like the last time I'd caught a fever. I moved a hand to my forehead. Come to think of it, I did feel a little warm. Well, it was only a little. Who said it _was_ a fever? I couldn't just lie there...I hated being useless.

I pulled myself to my feet and headed for the bathroom. Looking in the mirror showed my slightly pale face. It reminded me of Mom, those times when she had gone to work with a fever. All those times I'd worried about her, wished she would just stay home and rest...My fists clenched. It hurt me to admit it, but I was thinking just like her. I had to tell someone I wasn't feeling good, then lie down and get that rest, for Mom's sake if not mine.

I was pretty sure that Dad was already at work, but Satomi was downstairs, sweeping the kitchen floor. She looked up as I approached.

"Kouichi? Are you okay? You look a little pale..."

I nearly reflexively told her I was fine, but caught myself in the nick of time.

"I think I'm sick."

Mom would've put a palm to my forehead and told me if I was sick or not. She was usually right. Satomi on the other hand told me to lie down on the couch while she dug out the thermometer.

"You _are _running a mild fever," she pointed a finger at the display. "Probably from all the stress you're going through. Why don't you lie down here and rest, I can keep an eye on you better from the kitchen."

I nodded, and lay back. Satomi moved one of the couch's cushions to pillow my head, and brought a light blanket from the closet and some children's aspirin from the bathroom.

"You just get some rest," I heard her say as I swallowed the aspirin. "I'll make you some soup for lunchtime, okay?"

"Thank you." Even though I had no appetite, it was the least I could do to try it.

Once Satomi had resumed her sweeping, I pulled the book I'd left on the table yesterday and started reading. After a while I started feeling a little lightheaded, forcing me to put the book down and close my eyes. That was the last thing I remembered.

I woke from a strange dream involving being surrounded by people speaking English to realize that there _were_ people speaking English. I opened my eyes to see that it was on the TV. Someone was watching a movie in English, with subtitles in Japanese. I turned my head slightly to see Kouji sitting on the floor, leaning on the couch with his back to me. Raiko was lying on the floor beside him.

"What's this?" I wondered out loud. The characters looked familiar, but in my current state of slight lightheadedness and semi-awakenedness I couldn't place them.

"_Hoshi no Taisen_. It's an American movie, they call it 'Star Wars...'" That last part was said in English. "I know there's a Japanese dubbed version, but I just like hearing it in its' normal language better."

"Saw it once," I mumbled. "When I was a little kid, Mom took me to see the movies...The end of the second one scared me, and I never got into them...It's probably not as scary as I thought it was."

"It's not scary at all. It's my favorite movie."

"I was scared of a lot of things as a little kid, okay?"

He didn't say anything to that, and we were both quiet for a few minutes.

"Satomi went out to run some errands," Kouji broke the silence at last. "She asked me to keep an eye on you until I had to go to Aikido class. She also left some soup on the stove if you're hungry."

"That's very sweet of her." Now I felt even worse for mentioning I was sick. I was making Kouji go out of his way just to keep an eye on me. He didn't need to babysit me!

"D'you need any aspirin?" Kouji asked. "Satomi said the one she gave you would wear off soon."

"I'm fine."

He gave me a searching look. "I'll let the thermometer decide that."

Kouji briskly rose to pick up the thermometer and stuffed it under my arm before I could say anything. After it beeped, he took it out.

"You're still sick. You should take another aspirin now."

I wanted to tell him that he didn't need to worry about me, that I was _fine,_ but I felt lightheaded, and suspected he was probably right. I swallowed the aspirin as Kouji sat down again. A few minutes passed, as I waited for the effect of the aspirin to kick in. The movie came to an end. I sort of hoped it meant Kouji would leave me alone and stop worrying, but he got up and changed the discs, putting on the second movie in the series.

"You don't have to wait here with me," I hoped I sounded convincing. "I'll be okay."

He glared at me. "Wasn't that what you told Satomi the other day?"

"Huh?"

"You told Satomi you were just fine. You have an annoying tendency to not speak up when you're suffering."

"I...I didn't want to cause any more trouble. I don't usually get sick..."

Kouji snorted. "Seriously, _I_ cause more trouble than you do, Kouichi. And...I haven't known you for very long, but I know you're suffering. I can feel it. We're connected, because we're twins."

I couldn't think of anything to say, so I kept my mouth closed and looked down at the couch beneath me

"Besides, ever since the first night I've heard you crying at night," my brother continued. "It's a wonder you weren't sick earlier with all that crying you were doing."

I remembered that first night, when someone had pulled the pillow off my face. That someone had been Kouji, after all.

"I should've done something earlier," Kouji turned to gently brush some hair out of my eyes. "Slept in your room maybe...Or told Satomi you were crying, but I couldn't. I didn't want to get close to you. I didn't know anything about being a brother...And I was jealous that you had Mom all these years."

I closed my eyes. "Everything Mom did, she did for me...She worked long hours so I could be happy. I didn't want her to worry about me. She was the same way."

"That explains a lot."

"When Mom died and I came here...I felt like I'd somehow caused all this to happen. Even though I _knew _it wasn't true. Every time you'd argue with Dad...I felt like it was my fault. That's why I didn't want to make things worse by telling anyone how I felt."

He turned back to the TV, wrapping his arms around his knees as he did so. "You can cry in front of me any time, big brother. I promise it won't burden me."

I grinned faintly. "I'd take you up on that offer, but I think I'm still all cried out from the funeral."

Kouji snorted again, this time from laughter.

"Given how much you've been crying lately, I'm not that surprised. Seriously, you aren't a burden. So don't go thinking you_ are_."

"I'll try."

Kouji responded by saying a phrase in English. Not knowing much English, the only words I could make out were "Do" and "Do not."

"Huh?"

Kouji smirked at me and pointed to the television. "A line from the movie. Translates to 'do or do not, there is no try.'"

I laughed. It was a bit weary, but still a laugh.

Satomi got home about half an hour later to find the two of us still there watching the movie. We hadn't talked much since that last exchange, but we didn't really need to. He was there for me, and that was all I really needed at that moment.

"Kouichi, are you feeling better?" She asked, putting down the grocery bags she was carrying.

"Some." This time at least it was the truth. "I think my appetite's coming back."

"That's a relief," Satomi gently brushed her hand against my forehead. "You're definitely_ looking _better, at least. Kouji, thank you for watching him."

He ignored her, but flashed a brief smile at me behind her back when she turned.

"I have to go to Aikido class soon,. You get some rest, big brother. You're probably a good patient, but I'd rather not have go through all_ that _again."

I grinned back up at him. "I will."

The next day I woke up feeling much better.

"You're looking better," Satomi said as I came down the stairs. "Would you like some breakfast?"

"Thanks," I sat down at the table, where Kouji was already fully dressed and eating.

"Kouichi, I was wondering if you'd like to walk to the library with me today after breakfast," Satomi told me as she pulled a dish out of the cupboard. "You haven't been there yet, and we should get you a library card there."

"That would be great, thank you. I'm almost finished the last book I got from the old library, and I'd like to see where your library is."

"Great, we can go when you're done with breakfast...Would you like to come, Kouji?"

He glared at her, clearly not interested.

"Just this once?" I asked. "So they don't think I'm you?"

A sigh. "All right. Just this once. I'll go take Raiko for a short walk before we go."

As he left, Satomi turned to me.

"I've _never _seen Kouji agree to something like that. You know Kouichi, I think you might be the best thing that happened to him in a very long time."

I smiled. "I know...I wish Mom could've been here to see it."

**Author's note: Shows how much I pay attention to things...Didn't realize you had to hit "add character" after you put the name of the protagonist in the checklist. My bad, that should hopefully be cleared up by now. **

**Anyways, short chapter I know. It could use some polish, but I'm working on the next chapter...It'll be much longer. To answer some of the questions in the reviews, I was planning on sticking to Kouichi's view for this fic, since he's a bit similar to me. I may try writing a sibling (See what I did there?) fic of the events from Kouji's point of view when I'm done with this one. I'm planning on getting them to school (The same school) eventually. Also, I can't remember if "Hoshi no Taisen" is the official Japanese title for "Star Wars," but if I remember correctly that's what it translates to. They're watching the original trilogy, by the way.**


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I still do not own Digimon, any of its' characters, or any other franchise I might accidentally mention._

Three weeks had passed since that fateful day. I was adjusting as well as could be expected under those circumstances. So was Kouji. We still weren't exactly _used _to each other. Kouji's glares still made me want to hide behind something, and my tendency to just curl up with a good book drove Kouji crazy...Or so he said. He also had the tendency to practice the guitar when I was trying to read, but that was easily solved by closing the door to my room. He wasn't exactly very good at it, but as long as I didn't have to actually_ hear _it, I was fine.

Still, we actually hung out with each other at least once a day. Usually it was when I wanted to go to the library or when Kouji had to go to Aikido class. It turned out the two places weren't far away from each other. I also joined him when he had to walk Raiko sometimes. It became common to see the two of us walking down the street together.

Of course, I learned there were annoying things about having a twin brother. For instance, people would get our names mixed up. Usually mistaking me for Kouji. Satomi was particularly bad at this. "Kouji...I mean _Kouichi_, can you take out the trash for me?" It got to the point where even I felt like snapping at her a little. Not that I ever did, she didn't deserve it. Kouji wasn't quite so pleasant.

Aside from that, I got along fine with Satomi, and to a lesser extent Dad. I still hadn't gotten used to him being in my life...And Kouji hadn't forgiven him for lying to him about my mother and me. This wasn't to say he was a bad person, of course. He, having a lot more money to spare, gave me an a much larger allowance than I'd got from Mom. He also gave me a bright shiny new cell phone. Not that I ever turned it on, let alone used it, but I did keep it on me, just in case of an emergency.

I hadn't forgotten Mom through all of this. Each day I'd talk to the picture of her on her shrine, usually about how the day was. I'd always end by saying how much I missed her. I still cried, but it wasn't quite as bad as it used to be because of Kouji. He made a point of hanging out in my room every night, and bringing the futon into my room to stay with me on the worst nights. Dad at one point suggested we share my bed instead of dragging the futon back and forth, but we both shot that idea down, Neither of us were ready for_ that_.

It was Satomi who came up with the idea, at dinner one night.

"I was thinking...We need to do something as a family, and the boys need something good to happen before they start school. Why don't we all go to that new amusement park that just opened up?"

Kouji flinched, no doubt dreading the idea of spending _any _sort of family bonding with either Dad or Satomi. Dad either didn't see it, or decided to ignore it.

"That sounds like a great idea, Satomi. I don't know if I have this weekend off though..."

Satomi's face fell. Dad swiftly backpedaled.

"...I'll see what I can do. No promises, though."

Kouji didn't want to go, but Dad pretty much left him no choice. My brother was naturally very irritable the morning we were supposed to go. Of course, the fact that the late summer day was blisteringly hot had something to do with it. It was hot enough that Kouji had to take off his light jacket and tie it around his waist.

"What's the point of 'family bonding' if one person's not even _family _and another one spent almost ten years lying his son about the rest of his family," he grumbled to me as we waited in the living room for Dad and Satomi to get ready. Raiko, naively thinking this adventure was going to involve _her _somehow, bounded from living room to kitchen and back yipping happily.

"Too bad we can't bring dogs to amusement parks," Kouji continued scratching her ears. "_Raiko's _more family than Satomi is."

I flinched, and hoped Satomi hadn't heard that. A few seconds later, Dad came down the stairs, followed closely by Satomi.

"I'm sorry Satomi, I told you I couldn't make any promises..."

"But Kousei, can't you just call in sick this once?"

"I used up most of my sick days dealing with Tomoko and Kouichi. I'd like to save the few I have left for real emergencies."

"But..."

"Satomi, you and the boys can go to Fun World without me. You said yourself they need something good to happen, right?

"I..."

"Bring home some cotton candy for me, all right?" Dad pulled his tie on and headed for the door, barely dodging an enthusiastic Raiko. "Kouji, can you put Raiko outside? She's gonna try and make a break for it the moment I open the door."

Kouji and I glanced at each other. Spending an entire day with Satomi ranked just under getting a big hug from a complete stranger on Kouji's "Things I do not like" scale. And now I was stuck with just the two of them. So far, this was shaping up to be an..._Interesting _day.

Since Dad had taken the family car, we were resigned to use the subway to get to Fun World. The subway had a problem with their cooling system, it was boiling! Once we got there, it wasn't so bad. There were lots of rides and the wind from the rides kept us cool. Well, our _bodies_ cool at least. Our tempers...Well, not so much. Kouji point-blank refused to get on a ride with Satomi. The few rides poor Satomi got on, she usually wound up in the car behind us. I felt sorry for her...She'd been trying to make this a family outing, and it was hardly fair to leave her out of this. Kouji however was as stubborn as a rock.

Still, outside of my brother's bad feelings towards our stepmother, we had a good time. We managed to strike up a deal. We'd do one of the wilder rides Kouji favored, then one of the calmer rides Satomi and I liked.

Lunch was fried dough and hamburgers, an American food I'd never had before. Looking at the prices, I cringed. Mom would've had a fit at those prices! But Satomi seemed determined to treat us, and the hamburger was delicious.

It was in the late afternoon when Satomi decided our afternoon of fun was nearly over. As we neared the park's exit, Kouji caught sight of the massive ferris wheel which dominated all nearby rides.

"Hey...Let's go on that one, big brother," I looked up to see the enormous wheel Kouji was pointing to.

"But Kouji, we're leaving..." Satomi withered under Kouji's glare, then he turned his back on her.

"We can go after this one. C'mon, Kouichi." Kouji headed towards the wheel, the stiffness of his shoulders displaying his attitude towards her.

"But, Kouji..." Satomi began, then sighed. "All right, one more. Then we're leaving." We began walking after Kouji.

"I think one more's my limit," I said. "My feet are starting to hurt."

"Mine, too. After this I'm gonna put up my feet and take a nice long bath."

I smiled as we joined Kouji at the end of the line for the wheel, which was accurately named "The Mammoth." It was a very popular ride going by how long the line was, and the wait wasn't comfortable in the blistering heat. Eventually we made it to the front of the line.

"You can get in a different car," Kouji told Satomi as the car that we were evidently going in emptied its' passengers through a door in the other side. I opened my mouth, about to point out that Satomi's feet were tired, and she needed a break from his attitude if nothing else, but Satomi shook her head.

"I think I'll pass this time. I'm not a big fan of ferris wheels. I'll meet you at the exit when you're done."

Kouji glared at her, no doubt trying to find some ulterior motive, but she just smiled and stepped out of the line.

We got into the car in seats facing each other and buckled our seat belts. That's when I noticed some sort of commotion at the head of the line we'd just left. From what I could hear through the open door, the people behind us were together, and there were more than the two others the car could comfortably hold. So the ride's operator was instead waving the next person in line, a skinny brown-haired kid about the same age as Kouji and me, into the car. The boy, not familiar with the fact that my brother didn't like to be touched, sat down in the seat uncomfortably close to him. The expression on Kouji's face nearly made me laugh. Kouji scowled, and shuffled as far away as the seat belt would let him as the ride started moving.

The first minute of the ride was silent, then as we went higher and higher into the air, the new boy pressed his nose against the window.

"Ha, stupid Shinya got stuck on the merry-go-round! He looks like a bug from up here!" Kouji rolled his eyes at the talkative boy. I stifled another giggle.

As we were going around a second time, the ride suddenly screeched to a halt leaving us just past the top. The three of us blinked at each other.

"Did something happen?" The new boy asked.

"They're probably just letting someone off," I said.

"No," Kouji replied, peering out of the window. "You can see from here...All the lights in the park just went out. It's a blackout."

"A blackout? Don't rides have generators for this sort of thing? There!" The new boy pointed as the lights on the other rides surged back on.

"Good thing this was our last ride," I told Kouji. "With the blackout they'll probably close the park until the power comes back on."

"What?" The boy whined. "Aw...We just got here, too!"

"Maybe the power will come back on quickly enough that they won't close it," I suggested it more to be polite than anything else.

"Yeah, you're right."

There was another minute or so of silence, before the boy finally lost his patience.

"Ooh, why aren't we moving?!" He started shuffling around hard enough to rock the car. "The other rides are all moving, why aren't we?"

Kouji scowled at the sudden noise and rocking.

"Stop that, you idiot. You aren't helping."

"Who's an idiot? I just want us to get moving already."

Actually, the boy had a point, I thought as the two of them continued to bicker. If the other rides were letting their passengers off, why wasn't this one? Unless something had gone dreadfully wrong...To make things worse, it was hot in there. At least the car had shade, I thought looking at the top of the circular car. We'd bake if we were left out in the sun.

The boy and my brother's loud arguing was interrupted by an unfamiliar cell phone's ring. The boy looked confused for a moment, then pulled the ringing phone out of his pocket.

"Yeah?" That was when Kouji's cell phone also rang. He scowled again and pulled it out. There was silence for a few seconds.

"We're_ what?"_ The boy yelled, causing the car to rock a little as he moved. "Can't they just hook it up to another generator or something?!" There was another pause as I came to the conclusion that we were probably stuck there for the time being, at least. "Whaddya _mean_ they can't?"

Kouji sighed, hung up the phone, and unbuckled his seat belt to move over to my side. I hadn't heard his conversation with what was probably Satomi over the other boy's yelling, but I'd heard enough of _him_ to get the message.

"We're stuck here?"

"The generator the ride's hooked up to is shot, meaning we're not going anywhere until the power comes back on. And from what Satomi says about half the wheel is too high up to get rescued by the fire department."

"So we're _really_ stuck here," the boy put his own phone away. "Um, as long as we're here, we may as well introduce ourselves. I'm Takuya Kanbara."

"Kouichi," I said quietly. "This is Kouji. My brother."

"Yeah, you two sure look like brothers," Takuya glanced back and forth between the two of us. "In fact, you almost look like twins."

"We _are_ twins," The scowl was back on Kouji's face.

"Well, how was _I _supposed to know?" Takuya unbuckled his own seat belt and got up.

"What are you doing?" Kouji asked as Takuya began messing with the lock on one of the doors.

"What's it look like, I'm opening the door. It's boiling in here."

He had a point. Opening the door let in some fresh air, even though it didn't change the temperature much.

"Fine, whatever," Kouji groaned. "If you want to fall out, that's _your_ problem."

"I'm not going to fall out," Takuya paused to take in the view. "Wow...it's a good thing Mom didn't come with me after all...She doesn't like heights. Is that why _your_ mother didn't get on?"

"That's none of your business."

"I was curious, all right?! Geez..." Takuya sat back down. There was silence for a few minutes. I peered outside the window to see two fire trucks pulling up by the ferris wheel, no doubt to rescue the passengers that could be reached.

"Too bad those fire trucks can't reach us. Wonder how long this is gonna take." He looked over at us. "Either of you guys want to play a game?"

I wasn't really in in the mood to be social, so I just shook my head. Kouji glared at him, then went back to staring out the window.

"Aw, c'mon...I'm getting bored. Man, I wish Dad was here. Or Shinya. Or anyone else."

"Don't you ever shut up?" Kouji demanded.

"What d'you think we should do? It's not like we can just read books or anything. And I don't see how you two can just sit there all the time."

To be honest, I seriously wished I'd brought one of my books. The only reason I hadn't was because I couldn't fit it in my pocket.

"Just wait for the blackout to end," Kouji suggested pointedly. "It won't take too long."

"Yeah, well how long is _that, _genius?"

I sighed and looked out the window. _Anything_ to get my mind off Takuya and my brother bickering.

The minutes ticked by. Takuya and Kouji were now reduced to sullen silence, which made it a bit easier to endure, although the silence was starting to get a bit awkward. Fortunately the sound of Takuya's phone ringing took my mind off thinking of something to say that wouldn't set either of them off.

He picked the phone up. "Hello?" Then "Hey Dad! No, we're fine. Just bored out of our skulls." A pause, "Wait, you're telling me that it's gonna take _hours_ to get the power back on? But, I have to use the bathroom!" Another pause. Kouji and I exchanged glances. This did not look good for any of us. "Well, I didn't expect to be stuck on a ferris wheel for an hour, okay?!" Takuya shuffled the phone from one hand to the other while he listened to the response. "Okay. How's Shinya doing?" He smiled slightly. "He_ would_. Call me if anything comes up, all right?" And Takuya hung up.

"Well, according to my Dad, this is one of those major blackouts and they're saying it could take hours to get the power back on." He pulled off his goggled hat and ran the other hand through his hair. "So it looks like we're gonna be here for a while."

"Wonderful," Kouji ground out sarcastically. "At least it doesn't look like there'll be a thunderstorm. That would've made things worse."

I shuddered. Out in a thunderstorm on a high-up, _metal _ride...We'd have been sitting ducks for the lightning.

"Well, there wasn't any thunderstorms in the forecast, I checked. Hey, either of you guys want some bubble gum?" He pulled a packet out of his pocket. "It's not much, but it's the closest thing I got to food."

"No thank you," Kouji said stiffly. I decided I needed something to do besides listen to the others bicker, and took a piece.

"Dad says your father's on his way here, and that both our mothers are really worried. He took your stepmother to dinner with Mom and Shinya...He's my little brother," Takuya added. "The people at the park gave them a free meal. Shinya ate so much he's got a stomachache now."

I stifled a grin at that thought. I'd once eaten that much when we were invited to a new year's party at a neighbor's place, they'd had so much to eat I couldn't stop myself. Mom had been furious. I wished she was here right now...She could talk to Takuya so Kouji and I wouldn't have to. Or even Satomi...Kouji might not get along with her, but she was better at talking to strangers than either of us.

As the minutes rolled past, I kept my eyes on the window. As Takuya had said, the view was very impressive. The sun was just starting to set, staining the sky a shade of pinkish-orange. Nightfall meant relief from that sticky heat which, I thought, had probably been what caused the blackout in the first place. That would make it easier to get us down.

Takuya eventually started squirming in his seat, like a little kid. I had a fairly good guess what was causing the squirming, and his outburst confirmed it.

"Augh, I can't hold it in any longer!" He got up out of his seat, carefully to avoid making the car rock.

"You are _not_ going to do _that_ in here, idiot!" Kouji snapped.

Takuya turned bright red. "I wasn't! I was going to do it out the door."

"You might want to call your parents and tell them what's coming," I said with as much tact as I could muster.

"There's nobody _under_ the wheel. My Dad says that the park security pushed everyone out from under the wheel in case something like this happened. I just have to not fall out, right?"

Kouji snorted. "Think you can handle _that_?"

Takuya glared at him, then pulled down his pants. I decided that looking out the window on the other side of the car was the best thing I could do at that moment. I also had a feeling that Kouji and I would have to do that soon.

"So, you guys are here with your stepmother, right?" Takuya asked once he'd finished and sat down again. "That's what Dad said."

"I don't see how it's any of _your_ business," Kouji was back to glaring at him. I cringed. Here they went again...

"I'm trying to make conversation, all right? It's something people do to pass the time. We were here because Shinya pestered our parents into going. Oh, I wanted to go too, but he wouldn't stop whining until they caved. Shinya wanted to go on the Mammoth, but he was too short. You shoulda heard him cry when he found that out. Dad took him on the merry-go-round...But I'm kinda glad he's not here. He'd have been whining about how hungry and hot he was."

"That's funny, I remember _you _doing just that less than an hour ago," Kouji remarked.

"Well sure I did that, but not all the time like Shinya would."

"How old is Shinya, anyways?" I asked.

"Nearly eight. His birthday's in a couple of weeks. He's a real pain, but he's a good kid."

"I think all siblings are a pain at one point or another," I glanced at Kouji. My brother just rolled his eyes.

"You probably got it worse than me. I mean, you're_ twins_! You had to spend your entire life with 'mister grumpy' there!"

I didn't reply. Wasn't that how _"real" _twins lived? And yet I had only known Kouji for three weeks. What would've happened if our parents had never gotten divorced?

What would've happened if Mom had lived?

"Kouichi?" Takuya asked. "Hey, you okay?"

"Big brother?" Kouji shook my shoulder gently. I blinked and turned to him.

"Sorry...I didn't mean to space you on you guys like that."

Takuya and Kouji exchanged glances for a moment.

"No problem," Takuya was using the kind of voice that said he'd made a mistake and was trying to make up for it. "Looks like they got everyone out that they could reach...The fire trucks are leaving."

Another minute of silence passed. I shifted my gaze down to the hands in my lap. If Mom were still alive, we'd both be at home right now. There wasn't much point keeping a secretary around when the power was out. That also went for libraries. I'd be curled up on the couch with a good book, Mom would be trying to make dinner without burning it...We'd probably just have something simple, like rice again. But if she hadn't died, I wouldn't have met Kouji...I wouldn't have even known I _had_ a brother.

Was it a good thing she died? I immediately quashed _that_ thought. _No,_ it wasn't. I wanted her back with every moment that passed. Maybe I wouldn't have met Kouji the way I had, but if she had lived, there was a chance that the two of us would have met. Then we could've _all_ have been together, and _happy_...

Not that I wasn't happy living with my father. Not at all. I just missed my old life, especially my mother.

That was when Kouji's cell phone rang. He picked it up, then rolled his eyes slightly.

"Yes Dad, we're fine." He paused then added "Raiko needs walking. That's the only thing we really need right now." His eyes narrowed, then he handed the phone to me. "Dad wants to talk to you."

I've never been really good at talking on the phone. I've always liked talking in person better. I sighed and pulled the phone up to my ear.

"Dad?"

"Kouichi, how're you doing?"

"We're okay...It's just a bit awkward up here, that's all."

"Do you have your cell phone? Satomi tried it earlier, but it's off."

"Yeah I do, I don't usually turn it on."

"You should. I'm not sure if Kouji charged his last night, but it's a good idea just in case. They're saying it's the drain in the power grid from all the heat that caused all this. It could be a long time before it's on again. They're trying to fix the generator, but that could also take a long time."

I pulled my own phone out of my pocket and turned it on.

"It's on now," I told him. "I'll give Kouji back his phone."

"Just one more thing...You two are on with the Kanbara boy, right? That's what Satomi said."

"Yeah."

"His mother says he has a tendency to speak before he thinks...I'm sure Kouji knows how to handle himself, but just make sure they don't snap each other's heads off, okay?"

"I'll try," I said glancing at Takuya and my brother. They were both back to sulking again. "I can't make any promises, though."

"Just do what you can. I'll see you when they get the power back up."

I hung up Kouji's phone and handed it back to him.

"Anything new?" Takuya asked.

"I guess the heat caused all this. We could be here for a long time."

"Figures," Takuya sagged back against his seat, and glanced out at the sky. "I'm getting hungry." He pulled the gum out of his pocket and took another piece. "Either of you want another one?"

Kouji threw him another glare. I merely shook my head.

"What? I was trying to be nice. People _share_. Don't you two share stuff?"

We hadn't done too much sharing. I'd borrowed Kouji's clothing that time after Mom had died, and Kouji had borrowed my umbrella once when he couldn't find his own, but besides that we were fairly...What was that phrase? Self-sufficient. Of course, we had probably become self-sufficient for different reasons. I had to since we didn't have a lot of money and I hadn't wanted to make Mom worry about me too much. Kouji probably had because he'd moved around a lot before we'd met, and because of his distrust of Satomi and to a lesser extent Dad.

Neither of us spoke. Takuya looked back and forth between the two of us, his eyes narrowed. "Something's going on here. You two don't share stuff? Shinya and I've been sharing clothes and toys since he was born..." He stopped for a moment, as realization hit him. "You have a stepmother...Maybe your parents got divorced...Did they split you up?"

"I already told you, it's none of your business!" Kouji snapped. I looked down at the floor.

"I thought so," Takuya said triumphantly. "That explains a lot."

Kouji turned his glare out the window.

"Not that it really matters to me or anything. You both seem like nice enough guys to me. Even _you, _Kouji. Anyways," Takuya popped the gum into his mouth. "Wonder how long it's gonna take to get us down from here."

"_Too_ long," Kouji muttered grimly.

Takuya's shoulders stiffened, but he ignored the insult. "It's sunset now, it'll be dark soon...That'll cool everything down and make it easier for them. We could be home before bedtime."

We waited some more as the sun slowly crept below the horizon. Other than the searchlights in the park below us, and the occasional helicopter whirring by overhead, there were very few electric lights. I suspected the park people were trying to conserve their generators.

"It looks like Dad's taking Shinya home," Takuya said hanging up his phone. "He's getting tired of waiting...You watch, he's gonna get into my room and play with all my things! Ugh, I hope that kid doesn't break anything..."

The absence of both street lights and clouds meant that the stars were easily visible that night. It almost made Takuya and my brother's bickering tolerable. However it brought back memories of my mother and the summer nights we'd spent at that hill at the park looking at the stars. Something we'd never do again. Mom was _gone_...I shuddered.

"Are you okay, Kouichi?" Kouji put a hand on my shoulder.

"Just...Thinking," I said quietly. "Mom and I used to go out and watch the stars come out on days like this."

The hand on my shoulder wrapped around my neck to come down my other shoulder. I shuddered again remembering the last time we'd done that, three weeks before she'd died. We'd seen a shooting star and I'd made a wish on it, that me and my mother would be happy _forever..._It hadn't worked that way.

"Kouichi, what's wrong?" Takuya clearly didn't have a clue about what I was going through, and it worried him. "What's going on?"

"N-nothing," It's not that I didn't want to talk to Takuya about it, it's that right at that moment it _hurt_ too much to say anything.

"Kouichi, did something happen to your mother?" Takuya wasn't very good at taking hints. And Kouji wasn't very good at staying out of situations like these. He got to his feet, causing the car to sway.

"Leave him alone!" He snapped. I gaped at him, tears leaking from my eyes in spite of myself. This couldn't be happening...

"I was trying to _help _him," Takuya also got to his feet. "How can I help him when I don't know what's wrong?"

"It's not your business, and it's too painful for him to talk about it. Stay away from my brother!"

"Oh, so _that's_ it. You're just gonna protect him by keeping any potential friends away from him. That worked _so _well for you..."

Takuya didn't get any further as Kouji slammed him into the wall above the seat. Now Kouji was standing over Takuya who was sort of slumped into the seat. I had to grab the arm rest by the seat as the sudden motion set the car to rocking wildly.

"You're just lucky I haven't thrown you out of the door," my brother hissed in the silence that followed. This was all my fault...I had to do something, quickly. Before someone really _did_ get thrown out.

"Stop! _ Stop it!_" I shrieked at the top of my lungs. "Kouji, just...Just _stop_! _Please!"_

Kouji and Takuya both looked like they'd completely forgotten I was there. They glanced at one another, then Kouji let Takuya go and moved to sit next to me again. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to his own shoulder. I took several deep breaths trying to pull myself together before pulling away from him and turning to Takuya.

"Our parents got divorced when we were too young to remember...I lived with Mom, Kouji lived with Dad. They didn't tell either of us about each other because it hurt both of them too much to talk about it..."

I moved to sit up a bit before continuing. "Three weeks ago my mother was hit by a car and killed, so I had to go live with Dad. That was when Kouji and I met."

"I'm sorry," Takuya said quietly. "If I lost_ my _Mom, I don't know what I'd do...It must be hard for you."

"Harder than anything."

"But, if your parents are divorced, you've got two different family names, right? I thought it was strange when you two introduced yourselves and didn't mention a family name. What _are_ your family names, anyways?"

"Kouichi Kimura..."

"Kouji Minamoto," my brother said before I could finish it.

"Kimura and Minamoto, huh? I'm sorry if I pushed you too hard, Kouichi. I thought it would help if you talked about it."

"It helps a little," I wiped my eyes. "It's not your fault. It's not _anyone's_ fault...It's just...I _miss_ her."

"We _both_ miss her," Kouji corrected me in a gruff tone. I looked up at him to see he'd turned a nice shade of pink.

"Anyways," Takuya awkwardly rubbed the back of his head. "I just wanted to say that what just happened doesn't change my opinion of either of you, Kouichi. In fact, when we get out of this maybe the three of us can hang out together some time. See a movie or something."

I smiled up at him.

"That would be great."

Fortunately that last fight between Takuya and Kouji seemed to have taken all the bitterness out of them. The next few hours passed with slightly more normal conversation...Well, normal for the two of us, at least. Neither of us are really good at talking. Kouji's better at it than I am. Eventually the lateness caught up with me, and I began yawning.

"Tired?" Kouji asked. I nodded. He got to his feet.

"You can sleep on the seat. There's enough room."

I looked up to see him moving to sit next to Takuya. Well, if he was willing to give up his seat so I'd have someplace to sleep, who was I to say no? I lay down in the spot Kouji had just occupied. It wasn't exactly comfortable, there was just enough room if I curled up. Still, I was tired enough that it wouldn't take me too long to drift off to sleep.

"Good night, Kouji."

I awoke later at a very strange sound; a very loud hum which scared me for one heart-stopping instant before I realized what it was. The wheel was turning. That meant the power was back on. There was another sound, a very loud exuberant whoop in Takuya's voice. I sat up, and accidentally knocked Kouji's jacket to the floor. He must've put it on me after I fell asleep.

"Kouichi, you're awake?" Kouji asked.

I nodded. "The power's back on?"

"It's still gonna take a few minutes to get us off," Kouji pointedly glanced at Takuya, who was glued to the window watching the descending scenery. "There are other people on the ride, you know."

"Yeah, I know that," Takuya retorted. "The power's back on, and that's what counts."

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Just past midnight," Takuya replied as the wheel slowed to another halt. Evidently it had reached the first of the trapped people. I could hear their cheers, as well as the cheering from people in the cars next to us. It wouldn't be long now. And it turned out to take less time than I'd expected before we were moving again, no doubt because there weren't people getting_ on_, and the people getting _off_ were more than ready to get out of there. It only took a few minutes for them to get to our car, and we could finally get off ourselves.

The first people I saw as I stepped off the ride were Dad and Satomi, along with a brown-haired woman who I guessed was Takuya's mother. My guess was confirmed as he brushed past both of us and rushed into her arms. Then Satomi was there, wrapping her arms around both of us. Kouji stiffened and scowled, but to his credit didn't try to pull away for a few seconds at least.

"You boys really have a knack for getting into trouble, don't you?" Dad asked as she released us and brushed tears from her eyes. He put an arm around me. "Let's go. We all need some sleep after all that, and I gotta get up early for work tomorrow."

"Hey!" Takuya had evidently untangled himself from his mother and came up to us. "I never got your phone numbers. D'you want to go see a movie next weekend?"

"That would be great," I said. Kouji merely nodded and pulled out his cell phone. In the corner of my eye I could see Dad and Satomi staring in shock. They hadn't expected _either_ of us to make a friend _that_ quickly, but then again _we_ hadn't expected to be trapped on a ferris wheel for eight hours.

"We can do you one better," one of the uniformed park officials cut in as he walked over. "We're giving everyone who was stuck on the Mammoth and their families season passes to Fun World to make up for all the inconvenience."

Kouji's face got this absolutely priceless expression, like he'd just been dunked into pickle juice. Takuya took the news much better.

"Really? We can come back here_ any time we want? _All_ right_!" He turned to us. "You two gotta come here with us next time! _Please_?"

Kouji and I looked at each other, then Kouji smirked at him.

"Sure we'll go, but if you make us get on that wheel again, I'll _really _throw you out the door."

**Author's note: This chapter was originally supposed to take six weeks after the first one, but then while researching Japanese schools for the next chapter I found out that Japanese summer vacations in fact last a month, so I had to make the time skip a bit shorter.**

**The strange thing about the beginning part is that my relatives always got me and my sister confused...And we don't look anything alike! I'm a lot older, for starters.**

**Anyways, I hope I kept the characters in character enough. I'm not quite satisfied with the way Takuya and Kouji bounced off each other, but I suppose I can go into better detail if I ever write that "Kouji's view" fic.**


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon nor any of its' characters. Enjoy!_

Just over a week after the Fun World incident (And several visits there with Takuya, two movies,, three spilled drinks, one ice cream accidentally being knocked into someone's face, and a few hundred arguments between Takuya and Kouji) was when school was scheduled to start again. Needless to say, Kouji and I were mildly relieved to find out Takuya went to a different school from us. He was a great guy, but sometimes he was a bit too much.

Of course since I'd moved in with my father's family, I had to change schools. Not that I was really attached to my old one or anything. Oh, I had friends there, but not real close ones, so there was no problem there.

The problem, if you wanted to call it that, was that I would have to go to the same school as Kouji. With people that already knew him, and would of course mistake me for him. It was bad enough that some of Kouji's fellow Aikido students always mistook me for Kouji, but a whole class? A whole class who would be very curious about the new transfer student and would probably pester me with questions until I was ready to pop. Add to that the fact that I'm bookish and not very good at talking to people, especially in front of a whole crowd, and you could see how nervous I was.

"I don't know why you're so freaked out about all this big brother," Kouji grumbled as I joined him in walking Raiko down the street the day before school started. "Just stand up there, say your name, write your name, say 'nice to meet you,' then sit down and ignore everyone. What's so hard about _that_?"

"Easy for _you_ to say. You've done it before, and the kids at your school _know _you. I have a feeling that everyone's gonna think I'm you with a haircut pulling off some prank."

"Once they see both of us together they'll know you're not me. Here, can you take the leash for a minute? My phone's going off."

I barely had a moment to grab Raiko's leash as Kouji pulled his phone out of his pocket. This was the first time I'd actually taken the leash. Raiko stopped when she reached the end of her leash, and realized that we weren't moving. She moved back to where we were standing and sat down.

"Kouji did a good job training you, didn't he?" I patted her ears making her tail wag.

"That's Dad and Satomi's anniversary," Kouji said over the phone. "We could make it in the morning or afternoon, if Dad doesn't decide to do something spectacular involving us." He paused. "Yeah, just make sure it's okay with the rest of your family first. I don't want to crash a birthday party." He hung up a moment later.

"Takuya?"

"Wants us to go to his brother's birthday party this Sunday," Kouji took Raiko's leash from me and we continued down the street. "He says it's to keep himself from going insane when all Shinya's friends come over."

"You said it's Dad and Satomi's anniversary?"

"Three years. Dad'll probably want to take her out to dinner or something. I really don't care as long as it doesn't involve _us_."

Raiko, distracted by something, suddenly jumped around Kouji causing him to trip. Fortunately he was so occupied he didn't see the look on my face. He really _didn't _care for Satomi, did he? All those times she made the kind of food he liked, all the things she bought for him...To him they were nothing more than attempts to win him over, not signs that she cared for him. I wondered how _anyone_ could see it that way.

...And was there anything I could do about it?

"That was delicious Satomi," Dad said as we helped her clear the dinner plates two hours later. Well, Dad and I helped, anyways. Kouji had put his empty plate in the sink without a word. Since the two of them were there, I decided that this was as good a time as any to ask them about their anniversary plans.

"D-Dad, Kouji says your anniversary is this weekend..."

"Is it that time already?" Dad ducked as Satomi pretended to hit him.

"Takuya wants us to go to his brother's birthday party, but it's the same day..."

"What time?" Satomi picked up the scrub brush and the first of the plates.

"I don't know, you'd have to ask Kouji. A-are you doing anything?"

"Well, I got something special lined up for Satomi," Dad winked at me. "But it's not gonna start until sunset at least, and since it's just the two of us, you boys can stay home."

"Sounds great. I hope you have fun." I really did, but I was thinking that maybe it would help if I could persuade Kouji to do something really nice for Satomi. Make her a cake, maybe? That was a no. Kouji had Mom's skill at making food, or lack of it rather. That went for making them dinner too, assuming Dad didn't already have a dinner planned. The best I could think of was flowers, or a card. Maybe we could make one of those hand-made cards for her.

"Don't forget school starts tomorrow," Satomi reminded me. "You should set your clock so it'll wake you up in time."

"I know, I'll do that right now actually." And there was the other thing I had to think about. School. I sighed. Well, the sooner I could get to the school's library, the sooner the other kids would forget about me. Maybe I could find some other bookish kids to be friends. That would be nice.

Unlike my old place, the school was closer, so it wasn't quite as far to walk. I had actually been there once; Dad had brought me and Kouji (So they wouldn't think Kouji had gotten a haircut) to the office to handle the transfer forms and get me registered.

"Too bad they don't let twins into the same class at my school," Kouji remarked as the two of us set off to school. "I always thought they all did, like you see in anime."

"Well, this _is_ real life. Besides, it's not like we were raised together. We can survive being apart for a few hours."

"That's true...Maybe I can see you at lunch, too."

We walked along the sidewalks for a few minutes. It didn't take too long for me to see other kids going the same way. I guessed we were getting close. Some of the other kids did double takes and stared at us.

"Minamoto, who's_ that_?" A girl called, as she and her friend ran by. They didn't stay long enough to hear Kouji's response, even if he had one. Which he didn't.

The schoolyard was full of chattering, playing kids. No doubt catching up on what they'd done during the summer. They were too busy to pay any attention to Kouji and me, so we made it to the front door without more than a couple of people staring at me.

"You remember where the office is, right?" Kouji pointed to a door at the end of a nearby hall. "Dad already handled the registration stuff, so they just want you to check in. I'll go with you."

I nodded.

The office was a lot busier than it had been the last time we were there. Secretaries rushed back and forth, trying to keep the school running smoothly. One of them noticed us as we approached the desk. Her eyes widened a bit, no doubt noticing that I looked a lot like my brother.

"H-Hi, my name's Kouichi Kimura, I'm the new transfer student." I had to talk loudly enough to be heard over the noise.

"Kimura?" The secretary pulled out a sheet and traced a finger down it. "Yes, there you are. You're in class 5-C. Sakamoto's class. You can meet him in the teacher's lounge. Do you need directions?"

"No thanks, we got this." Kouji turned to stride briskly out the door, leaving me following in his wake. He led me down a couple of halls, dodging other kids as we went. Soon we were at a door marked "Teacher's lounge."

"Should we knock?" I asked.

"I don't think so," Kouji pushed the door open.

The teacher's lounge was a lot brighter than the one at my old school. A set of large windows dominated the wall at the back. The rest of the walls were divided into cubicles and a large meeting table sat in the front. Several teachers were sitting in the cubicles, evidently typing on computers. One of them, an older woman, noticed the two of us.

"Minamoto! What...Oh, this must be your brother. They said you had one, he's starting in Sakamoto's class, right? Hey, Kenji!"

Mr. Sakamoto was a younger man, in fairly good shape. He pulled himself away from the cubicle he'd been in.

"Hello there, you must be Kimura?" I nodded. "It's nice to meet you, I hope you have fun. Minamoto, I can take it from here. You'd better get to class before it starts."

"I'll see you big brother." Kouji gave me a quick reassuring smile, then turned and left.

Mr. Sakamoto spent the next few minutes bringing me on a short tour of the school. Where the nurse's office was, where the principal's office was. Stuff like that. By the time the bell rang to start school, I knew most of these things. Then the time came to actually introduce myself to the class. Mr. Sakamoto brought me to a door with 5-C on a sign outside, and told me to wait before heading inside.

Well, waiting was definitely something I could do. I leaned on the wall by the door with a sigh. Was it always like this when someone transferred? Kouji had no doubt gone through this several times over the years. This was my first time going to a different school. All I could think of was that having Kouji around would make things much easier.

No, wait. What was I_ thinking_? He couldn't be around me all the time...

Was it only a month ago that I had met him? Had I become so reliant on him that I couldn't function in new situations without him around? I wasn't going to depend on my brother forever, I thought clenching my fists. I could handle a few kids staring at me.

The door opened and Mr. Sakamoto poked his head out.

"Kimura? You can come in now."

I managed a wavering smile of thanks, and headed in, keeping my eyes on the floor as I did. There was a chorus of startled whispers from my new classmates, "Minamoto" naturally being the most prominent word I heard. I unclenched my fists and forced myself to look at, and smile at, the other students.

"This is our new transfer student," Mr. Sakamoto was saying. I took the hint.

"Kouichi Kimura...It's nice to meet you."

I looked up to see the thirty-odd faces staring at me. _Great,_ just what I needed. Following Mr. Sakamoto's instructions, I wrote my name on the chalkboard at the front of the class. Then he asked the class if there were any questions. Naturally, every hand in the room shot up.

"You look just like Minamoto in 5-A! Are you related?" One girl asked.

"He's my brother," I managed to say that loudly enough that everyone heard. I don't have a loud voice...At my old school, people were always asking me to speak up.

The next girl was a little more personal. "He never told us he had a brother. Your name's Kou_ichi_...Are you his older brother?"

"Kouji and I are twins. Our parents got divorced when we were very young." There was another murmur from the crowd before another hand shot up.

"Why transfer here all of a sudden?" One of the boys asked. I dropped my gaze to the floor, clenching my fists slightly as that overwhelming grief came back. _Mom_...

"Iwato, stop asking such personal questions. Kimura, you don't have to answer if you don't want to." Mr. Sakamoto picked up a book. "Now if we're through asking questions, why don't you take the seat next to Akemi...Could you stand up so he could find you, please?"

At least sitting down next to a boy by the wall without windows was easy, I thought as I did just that. Luckily the rest of the school day passed without incident. Kouji stopped by during lunchtime to see how I was doing, which caused a stir among my classmates. Needless to say, Kouji found himself glaring at them until they all turned away.

"I wish they'd find someone else to stare at," he grumbled. "So, how's school been so far?"

I swallowed some of Satomi's onigiri. "Not too bad. I think I'll be all right for now."

He gave me that searching look that said I'd better be telling the truth.

"I'm serious. As long as they don't bring up how I came to be here, I'll be fine. I figure after a few weeks of me disappearing into the crowd, they'll mostly forget about who I look like. Besides, I can just bury myself into a book if it gets really bad."

"I hope so...I have a feeling Mrs. Kirigaya isn't gonna let me get away with dropping into your class like this for very long. You just take care of yourself, big brother."

"I'll see you later." I waved as he turned and headed out the door. Then I saw that the whole class was staring again. I sighed and grabbed the book I'd brought from home. The day when I just became a face in the crowd couldn't come soon enough for me!

A few days later came my father and Satomi's third anniversary...And Takuya's brother Shinya's birthday. Dad took the two of us aside that morning.

"I'm taking Satomi out for a dinner and to a dance tonight. I think she'd like it if you got her some flowers for our anniversary. Here." He handed us some money. "There's a flower shop over by the park if you want to go there."

Kouji glared at him, but reluctantly took the money.

"If it weren't for the fact that Dad would kill me if I_ didn't _buy flowers, I'd just go spend the money on candy or something," he grumbled as we took the train to Takuya's house. "I don't see why we have to do anything for _her_, especially since our real mother's dead."

"She deserves _some_ happiness at least," I moved out of the way of a departing passenger. "Honestly Kouji you're giving her more grief than I ever gave Mom."

He glared at me. "I spent three years being forced to call her 'Mom.' I'm not going to let her take Mom's place."

"Kouji, she's not trying to take over _anything_! She's just trying to be nice to us..."

"What do _you_ know? You got to live with Mom all these years." Kouji turned his back to me. There wasn't anything I could think to say to that, so I didn't say anything. The rest of the way to Takuya's place was spent in silence. Once we got there, it was easy to tell which house it was; The one with all the loud yelling from kids in the backyard.

"You guys came!" Takuya exclaimed, coming out the front door. "I swear, I was gonna go nuts with all these little kids running around. Shinya's the worst one of all!"

"No, _you're_ the worst," a younger boy who looked like Takuya stuck his head out the open door behind him. "Who are these guys? Did Mom say they could come?"

"I_ told _you, these are the twins who were with me on the Mammoth, and yes she did."

"Twins?" Shinya looked back and forth between us. "They aren't twins. Twins are supposed to look alike, right? His hair's too long," he pointed at Kouji. "And _his_ hair's too short," he pointed at me.

"Well, you're right," Kouji said. "But if you keep this up, we might just keep this for ourselves." He held up the birthday present we had got him.

"Oops. You two _do_ look alike after all. C'mon in." Shinya swiftly disappeared into the house.

"So, what did you get for Shinya, anyways?" Takuya asked in an undertone. "It'd better not be something that makes a lot of noise that'll drive me crazy...Or anything remote controlled. He'd destroy that in the first day!"

"A board game," I told him. "One of those games the whole family can play."

"Thank goodness!" Takuya led us into the house. "We were gonna do one of those quiet family-only parties, but Shinya wanted to go to one of those expensive kiddie entertainment places...This is the only thing he and Mom would agree on. Just put the present on the pile." He pointed to a large pile of presents on the nearby table.

"I got a _lot_ of presents this year," Shinya said smugly. That was when Mrs. Kanbara came around the corner.

"Shinya, shouldn't you be outside with your friends?" Shinya blinked, then ran out towards the backyard.

"I'm glad you two could make it," she continued. "At least you can help keep the younger kids from dismantling the place."

"Is Dad gonna get home from work soon?" Takuya asked.

"He just called, they need him to stay an extra half-hour, but once that's over he'll be here."

"Aw,_ man_..."

"Don't 'Aw, _man' _me, Takuya. Why don't you go do something helpful, like keeping those kids there out of trouble."

"C'mon." We moved out to the backyard where somewhere around a dozen young boys were running around. It reminded me of that video I'd once seen of hummingbirds from America at a feeder.

"We can sit down here," Takuya pointed to a swinging chair on the house's porch. From there, it was easy to watch the boys buzz around the yard.

"So, you said today's your father and stepmother's anniversary?" Takuya asked after a few minutes of this.

"They're going out for dinner and a dance later," I said, mostly to spare Kouji from saying anything. Maybe Takuya would know something I could do to help Kouji with Satomi. I couldn't exactly ask him with Kouji there though.

"That sounds cool. How long have they been married?"

"Three years."

"Really?"

There was another silence.

"I probably shouldn't be pushing you guys, should I? Anyways, my Dad will be home soon, then they'll open up Shinya's presents and stuff."

"Sounds like fun," I said. We watched the kids play what looked like soccer for a while. Takuya occasionally yelled encouragement and tips at the kids. It was fairly obvious he liked soccer.

"Where's your bathroom?" Kouji asked.

"Bathroom? Oh, end of the hall next to the living room. You can't miss it."

Kouji got up and headed back into the house. Well, with him gone, I decided that this was as good a time as any to ask him for advice.

"Hey, um...Takuya?"

"Huh?"

"I...Well, it's Kouji...He doesn't get along with our stepmother too well, he thinks she's out to replace our mother, even though she's really a nice person. I don't know what to do about it. The one time I tried bringing up the subject, he said that...That I don't know anything, since I grew up with our _real_ Mom. He's right, I really _don't_ know anything...What should I do?"

"Um, that's a good one..." Takuya thoughtfully cupped his chin. "All I can think of is one of those really stupid plans, like pretending to kidnap your stepmother and making Kouji rescue her..."

I gave him one of those "are you _crazy_?" looks.

"Well, I _told_ you it was stupid. Probably wouldn't work anyways."

There was an understatement if I'd heard one.

"Anyway, I think your problem might be that you're looking at them like an outsider would. I mean you've only known them for what, a month? Maybe it'll get better once their anniversary's over."

"I guess..."

Kouji came back then, ending that conversation. A few minutes later, Shinya and some of his friends decided to play hide and seek. One of the kids, a brown-haired boy with a big hat, approached us.

"Hey, can I hide under you guys? There's enough room under that chair..."

"Sure, Tomoki." Takuya moved his legs so that the younger boy could get through.

"Thanks."

"Tomoki's one of Shinya's classmates," Takuya explained. "They're like best friends."

"Shh!" Came the voice from underneath us. "You'll give me away!"

"Sorry. So, how's school going for you guys?"

I shrugged. "It's a bit different from my old school. The teacher I used to have was a woman, now it's a guy."

"Yeah, it's always weird to go to a different school. There's this girl in my class who was just came back from this long trip to Italy, she's got no idea how schools here work. I had to tell her stuff like how we all bow to the teacher when school starts...And I guess they don't have students clean their classrooms in Italy. I should introduce her to you guys at some point. She might enjoy having more friends besides me and that one upperclassman guy who keeps knocking himself out over her...What was his name again?" He shook his head. "Never mind. I think it might be a good idea for you guys to meet her."

"You, thinking? There's something you don't see every day." Kouji said it with a slight smile, so he was probably joking. _Probably._

_"Hey!"_

"Did I miss anything?" A man, I guessed he was Takuya's father, asked coming out of the house.

"Dad!" Takuya and Shinya (Who had been hiding behind a nearby tree) both said it at the same time. Takuya swiftly got to his feet, as Tomoki pulled out of the space between the bench and the porch underneath it.

"I found you!" Another little boy exclaimed. I guessed he was the seeker in their game of hide and seek.

"No you didn't, the game's over, Akito!" Shinya sounded exasperated. "Dad's here, so let's go open presents!"

The rest of Shinya's birthday party went without much incident. Well, besides Shinya getting a new remote-controlled car and deciding to test it out on his mother's garden outside. Beyond that, it was a typical party. It was nearly sunset by the time Kouji and I managed to get out.

"We still need to stop at the floral shop," Kouji grumbled as we trudged up the subway steps. "I wish we could avoid this..."

"Look, _I'll_ give the flowers to Satomi if you want," I sighed. "You just have to stand there and look supportive."

He glared at me.

"How about this, you use Dad's money to get the flowers for Satomi, and I'll use _my_ money to buy some flowers for Mom's shrine. That way, when we get home you can put the flowers for Mom on the shrine, and I can give the other flowers to Satomi, and _everyone's_ happy."

"Yeah, I suppose that works, big brother. Although _happy_ isn't the word I'd use."

"I know." I tried not to think of what our lives would be like if Mom were still alive.

The flower shop was brightly lit, in contrast to the setting sun outside. I noticed a girl in her lower twenties sitting at the desk with the register Kouji paused behind me, looking around.

"So, what d'you think we should get?" He asked.

"No idea...Maybe some roses or something."

"Hmm..." He moved closer to one of the plant refrigerators. For a moment, neither of us said anything.

"May I help you with something?"

_Both_ of us jumped. I swear, that cashier was a ninja.

"Is it a present?"

"Yeah," Kouji said.

"Oh, is it for your mother or someone?"

I nodded. Technically speaking, it was for _both _our mothers.

"That's great, just leave it to me. I think she'd love the festive bouquet."

We looked at each other, then Kouji shrugged.

"Could we have two please?" I asked.

"Two? Okay. I'll just wrap them up for you." The cashier picked up two of a colorful bouquet of flowers and brought them over to the register.

"Is it for your mother's birthday?"

"Today is...Their anniversary," Kouji said.

"Oh, is it the tenth, no the fifteenth?"

"It's only been three years."

"I see, three years." She paused. "_Eh?_ Why's it only been three years?"

Kouji didn't say anything, casting his gaze at the flowers in front of him.

"Our parents got divorced," I said, feeling irritated at that slightly tactless cashier. Why was it any of _her_ business how long our father had been remarried? "One of those is for our stepmother, and the other one's for our _real _mother, that way nobody feels left out."

Of course, I really didn't feel like mentioning that our mother was actually dead. That wasn't the sort of thing one said to the average cashier at a floral shop.

"Oh. That's really sweet of you two. Okay, your flowers are ready."

Kouji and I paid for the flowers and we left.

"Dad and Satomi probably won't get home until it's really late," Kouji said as we arrived at home. Was I calling it home now, rather than Dad's place or Kouji's place? I'd really come far over the last month or so.

"We can give the flowers to her tomorrow morning. They won't mind." Kouji held up his bouquet. "I guess I can just put these on Mom's shrine now. Satomi's got a spare vase in the closet somewhere. I should get another one for the one you're giving Satomi, too."

"Sure," I said. We both went upstairs, but he headed to the closet to get those vases while I went into my room. Mom's face smiled up at me from the picture I'd put on the shrine. If she were alive, she'd know how to bring Kouji and Satomi together. I missed her so _much_...

"Big brother?" Kouji was back. "You okay?"

"Sorry," I put down the picture I hadn't even known I was holding. "I was...Just..."

Kouji put an arm around my shoulders. "I know. Here, I got that vase."

I sat down on my bed while Kouji put the flowers into the vase and then on the table in front of the shrine. Then he stepped back to admire his handiwork, finally sitting down next to me. We were both silent for a moment.

"Do you want me to sleep in here tonight?" Kouji finally asked. "I can get the futon..."

"Yeah, I think I need it."

He started to stand up, then paused.

"Kouichi...That was a good idea to get Mom flowers, too. I think she would have appreciated them."

"Thanks," I smiled up at him.

We _both_ managed to sleep through Dad and Satomi's return that night...Actually, it was probably morning by the time they got back. Satomi looked a little worn out when we came down for breakfast the next morning. Dad was still asleep.

"Good morning," Satomi said cheerfully, dodging around Raiko as she pulled plates out of the cabinet. "Kouji, can you do me a favor and get Raiko to the back yard? She's starting to get underfoot."

Kouji scowled, but complied.

"How was your anniversary?" I asked.

"Oh, it was wonderful! Your father took me to a dinner and a dance, just like we did when we were first dating. I haven't had that much fun in a long time."

"'Morning," Dad yawned as he came down the stairs. "You two have fun at that birthday party?"

"Yeah."

This was when Kouji came back in, still scowling.

"Kouji, didn't you say you were getting something for Satomi yesterday?" Dad wasn't exactly _subtle_, was he? We glanced at each other, then I stood up.

"Yeah, he did. It's up in my room, I'll go get it."

It didn't take too long to get up to my room and grab the flowers. I had to move a bit slower going down due to the fact that the vase had water in it.

"We figured you deserved something nice for your anniversary," I held up the flowers. "Happy third anniversary, Satomi."

"Oh...Kouichi, this is _lovely_!" Satomi took the flowers, then placed them on the table before scooping both of us in a quick hug. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome," I said. It wasn't until she had her back to us to admire her flowers that Kouji turned and walked off towards his room. I watched him go, the smile fading from my face. How could he reject someone who treated him so kindly? It didn't make any sense. He couldn't live like this forever. Satomi couldn't live like this forever. _I _couldn't live like this forever...

Something had to give.

**Author's notes: Yeah, the school part was kind of short, but nearly everything I know about Japanese schools I got from watching anime, so that's not too reliable.**

**And yes, Tomoki makes an appearance and the other two get a mention at least. Sadly, I think this is the closest I'm gonna get to Junpei and Izumi in this fic. Not because I don't want to include them, but my muse and the plot bunnies haven't found a good storyline to introduce them.**

**Actually, right now the muse and plot bunnies are pushing me to end this 'fic because they want a sibling fic of Kouji's view...So sadly this is the second to last chapter.**


	7. Chapter 7

_Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon, its' characters, or any other franchise I might mention. Enjoy!_

The tension between Kouji and Satomi occupied my mind as the next few weeks passed and the weather grew colder. Admittedly, it hadn't been quite so bad since the anniversary, making me wonder if Takuya was right and I really did just need more time to get to know them.

Still, that didn't stop me from playing the...What was that word...Middleman to Kouji and Satomi, and occasionally Dad, too. It didn't stop me from occasionally feeling like an outsider, either.

It had been just over two months since the accident. Dad and I had been going through Mom's stuff one box at a time and clearing out the things we couldn't use. It had taken a long time for me to get to this point without breaking down...I really had come a long way since she'd died. We had taken the last box out of storage that morning, mostly letters. I really felt bad about reading my mother's mail, but there wasn't much point in throwing them away without reading them I simply skimmed through them a little.

The name "Satomi" caught my eye at one point. Satomi? What was this? I took a closer look.

This letter was addressed to one of Mom's older friends, one she'd met when I was old enough to remember, so they wouldn't have known anything about Kouji. The envelope it had come in had 'Return to sender" marked on it, which baffled me until I saw the date on the actual letter. Just over three years ago. That particular friend had moved around that time, and hadn't told Mom until later. Wait, _three_ years ago? That was when Dad and Satomi had gotten married, right?

_"...I just found out Kousei is getting married again. Her name's Satomi Uehara. I looked her up and called her. I didn't want to deal with Kousei and his lies, so I said I was Tomoko's 'cousin,' Motoko..."_

Mom didn't have any cousins by that name. In fact, she didn't have _any_ cousins. I wondered if Dad knew that. Satomi evidently didn't. Not for the first time, I wondered if he'd told Satomi Mom had died, too. I was too polite to ask her myself.

_"...I was a bit scared at first, but I wanted to see what kind of mother she'd make. She's actually a really nice person. It really surprised me. Then again, I don't think Kousei would marry anyone if they couldn't handle being a mother..."_

That part had to be about Kouji, I thought.

_"...But Satomi's definitely up for the task of being a mother. Even if we just talked for a while on the phone, I can tell that much."_

I had to force my hands to stop gripping the letter. _Mom_ had felt that Satomi would make a good mother. Maybe if I showed it to Kouji, he wouldn't feel that Satomi was trying to replace Mom. I opened the door to my room and went across the hall to Kouji's. He wasn't going to Aikido class today, therefore he'd be in his room, probably doing homework.

I knocked on the door. "Kouji?"

"What is it? I'm kinda busy."

"I need to talk to you, it's about Mom."

There was some grumbling, and my brother opened the door.

"I found out that Mom actually called Satomi when she married Dad..."

I barely had time to register the blue blur that shot out the door and down the stairs.

"Kouji? _Hey! _ Wait up!"

Satomi's workroom was downstairs. That was where she worked as a computer programmer, one of those jobs that didn't require more than a computer and a reliable internet access. Even as I pounded down the stairs, I could hear Kouji's shouting.

"...You talked to my mother. You _knew _she was alive, didn't you? You're no better than Dad is!"

"Kouji!" I managed to burst into the workroom just in time to find my brother staring down at a stricken-looking Satomi. "You took off before I could tell you the rest. Mom called Satomi, but she didn't use her real name. She thought Satomi would make a great mother, _that's _what I was trying to tell you."

He glared at me, I glared right back. The tense silence was broken by a muffled sob. We both turned to see Satomi with tears in her eyes. She was crying...

This was my fault. If I'd told Kouji about what Mom had said before he'd gone downstairs...

Wait, why was I blaming myself? Admittedly, I had been the one who accidentally started this mess, but Kouji had been the one who had taken it out on Satomi before I could tell him everything.

Kouji glared at Satomi and turned to walk out, no doubt trusting me to smooth things over.

_Again._

I moved faster than Kouji and out the door, closing it. Then I leaned my full weight into _keeping_ it closed. The doorknob in my hands rattled furiously.

"Kouichi, what are you _doing_?"

"I'm _tired_ of playing peacemaker with you and Satomi! I'm not letting you out until Satomi stops crying!"

"Kouichi, you...!"

"Every time Satomi tried to do something nice for you, you just ignore it. I've had _enough_! She's a great person, even _Mom_ could see that! Here!" I wedged Mom's letter under the door. "Read it for yourself."

There was a frustrated pause and the doorknob stopped rattling for a minute, long enough for the letter to get pulled the rest of the way under the door. Silence reigned for a moment.

"I thought there was something funny about the woman that called me that day," Satomi's voice quavered a little. "She knew too much about you for a mother's cousin."

There was an awkward silence on Kouji's part. The doorknob rattled some more, but I held on. As much as I didn't like eavesdropping on them, I couldn't let Kouji get out of _this_ one.

"I wish I could've met her face to face. If I'd have known she was alive, I'd have taken you to see her myself. It was your father's idea for you to call me 'Mom.' I don't want to replace her...I never did."

The doorknob relaxed. There was a long silence before Kouji finally spoke.

"I...I owe you an apology, Satomi. Not just for blowing up at you like that..." He took a deep breath. "It's because ever since Kouichi came here, I've been letting _him_ play the son in the family. Every time we did something...Fun World, the anniversary...I just stood by and let_ him _make you happy. I thought you were trying to replace Mom...But, I...I was letting Kouichi replace _me_."

"Kouji!" There was a pattering of feet, and a "Oof" from Kouji. At a guess, I'd say she hugged him.

"Nobody could _ever_ replace you. Not even Kouichi."

"R-really?" It sounded like Kouji was getting choked up, too. Good, he needed it. I decided that my job there was done, so I let go of the doorknob and headed back to the living room. Raiko was there. Well, this was the time of day Kouji usually walked her, and I was done with my homework. I picked up Raiko's leash.

"C'mon, Raiko...Let's get some fresh air."

When we came back, Kouji was waiting for us by the front door.

"Feeling better?" I asked.

"You might say that." He paused. "Kouichi, I want to apologize for making you go through all that. I was just so mad at Satomi...I was such an idiot."

"You were, but it's over now, right?"

"Right. No more making you the peacemaker, big brother. I promise."

I smiled at him. "Apology accepted. Now are you gonna stand there all day? That homework isn't gonna do itself, you know."

"Don't you still have to study for that math test tomorrow?"

I cringed. I'd forgotten about that. He smirked at me.

"Honestly Kouichi how did you get past your math tests before you met me?"

"Mom helped. She was great at math..."

"That skill must've all gone to me, then. C'mon." He led me and Raiko back into the house.

Dinner that night was definitely not like any night I'd had since I'd come to live there. Kouji and Satomi...Well, they didn't exactly talk any more than they normally did, but he smiled a lot more than he usually did, and he offered to help Satomi clean the table. Even Dad noticed the change.

"You two seem to be getting along better. Did something happen?"

Kouji and Satomi looked at each other, then he grinned at me.

"Let's just say we finally had some time to really talk." I turned a nice shade of red. Dad looked at me.

"I see...Did Kouichi have anything to do with it?"

"You might say that," I mumbled.

I woke up in the middle of the night feeling a bit strange. Almost like I was_ needed. _Kouji was having a bad dream...I don't know how I knew that, probably because of what Kouji had said that time when I was sick, that we were connected. I got up and crossed the hall and looked down at my sleeping brother. Sure enough, he had tears leaking from his closed eyes. His body was sweaty, and he twitched and mumbled softly, like he was dreaming. I moved to gently shake him awake, hoping he wouldn't reflexively punch me or something.

"No, Satomi,_ don't_..." Kouji gasped and his tear-filled eyes popped open. He just lay there panting, looking up at me for a moment before relaxing.

"Bad dream?"

He nodded. "Satomi was the one who got hit by that car, not Mom..." A shudder rippled through his body. "It was only a dream...Sorry I woke you, big brother."

He was still hurting from the dream, I could _feel _it. There had to be something I could do to help. Maybe I could get into the bed with him, just this once...? Assuming he didn't kill me just for trying. I pulled aside the blanket.

"Kouichi, what are you _doing_?"

I didn't say anything until I was under the blankets with him.

"When I was little and had a bad dream, Mom would let me share her futon. I think you need the same thing."

"Kouichi..."

I rolled over to grin at him.

"Just this once, all right?"

Kouji's eyes widened, and then he smiled back.

"Just this once."

FIN

**Author's note: So, this was in fact the second draft of the last chapter. The first one wasn't exactly G-rated. Basically Satomi manages to get hurt and Kouji is the one who finds her...A bit more cliched in my opinion, besides I wanted to keep this story K+, so I had to make another final chapter. It probably needs some more polish, but it's better than the other one.**

**Anyways, it's surprising how far I've come from the first chapter. Like I said then I mostly wrote it as a way of dealing with the death of a friend's mother, then it became an actual story. Thanks for reading, and stay tuned for Kouji's view of these events...Which will come when I get the "plot bunnies" to cooperate with me. They keep giving me a middle, not a beginning...Curse you, plot bunnies!**


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